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-   -   So senseless. (https://www.offshoreonly.com/forums/general-boating-discussion/120155-so-senseless.html)

Anarchy Powerboats 01-11-2006 12:22 AM

So senseless.
 
I am in Palm Springs right now on a show, I came back to my room to check email at around 12 noon and i popped into the GD to check on things when I came across the Martiniboats post regarding his death. I was numb for the rest of the day. I didn't know him but I knew what the situation was like I guess, they say the holidays are the worst time of the year for suicide and though I have never been so far down in the hole that I would consider it I know how it is from other circumstances that put me close to the situation. What troubles me about this is the fact that it is so senseless for it to happen to one of our own here on the board when there are so many of here on the board that LOVE one another and have such deep admiration and respect for one another. This board is an enigma in the way that it crosses so many socio-economic demographics to bring all of us together in under the commonality of boating and a love of the water and lifestyle that comes with it. There are people that I have never met on this board that i would do whatever I was able to to help em out, without naming specific deeds I will say this has happened more than a few times this year. Others that I have met I have grown to call "friend" that is in the truest sense of the word when I say this, not "buddy" I mean friend.
I am troubled, I am discouraged and I am angry that this has happened, to be desperate and scared when you are down or life is giving you a good kick in the junk is completely acceptable but to not reach out to those that love and care for you and will lift you when you cant stand is completly unfair, never got a fkn chance to help and all we can do is start a fkn thread saying that were sorry. I didn't know he was hurting, did you? How do our own people fall through the cracks and wind up forgotten? There were signs that only now do I see when I read the posts that he put up, unfortunately Im not always the brightest lighbulb in the world and I couldnt see it.
It does no good to speak ill of the dead so I wont but I would really appreciate it if any of you guys or gals would at least PM me if you are so fkn low you cant make it through the day, ALL of us on this board are human and have seen the abyss of futility, we know pain, loss, frustration, betrayal, loneliness, despair and misery some of us know these intimately. Sometimes the best way to deal is just simply to know you are not alone in this, you ARE NOT the first person to fail in business, lose the love of your life, regret decissions, have an addiction, question the future or be fearful of your world outside but you need to remember that others around you probably closer than you think have stood exactly where you are right now and would probably have no problem expressing themselves and tell there story to you. This is a support group on OSO in the truest sense of the word, were all fkn boat junkies and we dont want to find a cure, there is none. I would also like to not lose members because they were to selfish or scared or ashamed to seek the love of the masses on here, we love you you fkn idiots.
If I was ever feeling that ****ty I would call Byrdman or Cozzi, Byrd because he would call me a puzzy and then have me in stitches so quickly I would forget whatever the problem was. Cozzi is my Yoda on this board and wise beyond his years, I think there is alot more to him then he shows to us in this forum.
Please please, dont let this happen again, it is so senseless, never again.

racesdad 01-11-2006 12:41 AM

Re: So senseless.
 
I Second That, Most Of Us Are On Here Daily. If You Want, Pm Someone To Talk, We Are Here.anytime , Anyday.dont Be Afraid, Please , To Ask For Help, A Shoulder To Cry On,an Ear For Listening, Or Some Prayer To Ease Your Sorrow, Anything.
Mike

bobonthis 01-11-2006 12:46 AM

Re: So senseless.
 
Well said,I can speak from experience that I have had some bad times lately, not as bad as most, but we have some of the best people on here to help each other out. We have a good support system here and we should not be afraid to use it. As a matter of fact Metal Bros and Racesdad have both helped me out before and many others from this board. Don't worry if you think people will judge you or think less of you we all have our problems.

Formula Outlaw 01-11-2006 07:17 AM

Re: So senseless.
 
I had a very good friend do the same thing about four years ago. Marty was depressed over his marriage breaking up and Malaria, that he'd picked up in Nam, was giving him problems. He was up in NY state and I was down here going out to dinner with friends who were also Marty's best friends. He was actually talking on the phone how he was going to do it and my friend and I stayed on the phone with him for almost three hours and thought we'd talked him through the crisis. He was laughing and cracking jokes when we finally hung up to go to dinner. He promised us that he was "okay" and to call him when we got back. When we got back about two hours later, there was a message to call his sister. From the facts we received, I doubt if we'd cleared the driveway when he took his life.

Both Jason and MJ (his wife) had to go to counseling for over a year to get through it. Jason was Marty's best friend for 20 years or better. He's never gotten over it. So sad. People just have difficulty understanding how many people their actions effect usually for the rest of their lives. Jason now blames himself for not keeping Carole (his wife) and me on the line with Marty whle he drove to the airport and flew to NY. It is a very difficult situation that will never really get better. So useless and so tragic.

CigDaze 01-11-2006 07:38 AM

Re: So senseless.
 
Great post Metal Bros.
The whole situation certainly is so senseless, and very saddening. I wish there was more we could have done, I wish he would have asked for help. I hate seeing fine people go through troubles.

:( :(

HiPerf2000 01-11-2006 11:43 AM

Re: So senseless.
 
I don't think that anyone knows for sure what happened to him. There was just a message on his business machine from his brother stating that he is no longer with us. It's really a shame no matter how it happened :(

BRUCE SEROFF 01-11-2006 11:57 AM

Re: So senseless.
 
Well Said......Very Sad Story indeed.... :(

satisfactionII 01-11-2006 05:19 PM

Re: So senseless.
 
Everyday you wake up breathing is a blessing.

My heart goes out to Brian, he was a great guy. RIP
:( :(

Allan4 01-11-2006 06:01 PM

Re: So senseless.
 
Very Very sad to hear this....God Speed to his family and loved ones who are left to deal with the horror of this. Had a good freind do the same thing a number of years ago at a party at his own house. 12 gauge to his face. Luckily we did not find him, the cops did, we had to call them becuase we could not find him after running around the nieghborhood frantically looking all over for him...hoping for the best, but knowing what might have happened, afterall we heard the shot loud and clear. That was 10 years ago and I still think about it very often.

So senseless....prayers for the family.

Jassman 01-11-2006 06:23 PM

Re: So senseless.
 
If anyone ever wants to talk, call my cell, its on 24-7......... 228-216-0900 and no prank phone calls tonight :D


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