1) Over the hill, you pick up speed
>2) I love cooking with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food.
>3) If it weren't for STRESS I'd have no energy at all.
>4) Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed.
>5) Everyone has a photographic memory. Some just don't have film.
>6) I know God won't give me more than I can handle. I just wish he didn't
trust me so much.
>7) Dogs have owners. Cats have staff.
>8) We cannot change the direction of the wind - but we can adjust our sails.
>9) Some days are a total waste of makeup.
>10) Do you believe in love at first sight - or should I walk by you again?
>11) If the shoe fits - buy it in every color.
>12) If you're too open minded, your brains will fall out.
>13) Age is a very high price to pay for maturity.
>14) Going to church doesn't make you a religious person anymore than
standing in a garage makes you a car.
>15) Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
>16) If you must choose between two evils, pick the one you've never tried
>17) My idea of housework is to sweep the room with a glance.
>18) Not one shred of evidence supports the notion that life is serious.
>19) It is easier to get forgiveness than permission.
>20) For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program.
>21) If you look like your passport picture, you probably need the trip.
>22) Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
>23) A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
>24) Men are from earth. Women are from earth. Deal with it.
>25) A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
>26) Middle age is when broadness of the mind and narrowness of the waist
>27) Opportunities always look bigger going than coming.
>28) Junk is something you'vekept for years and throw away three weeks before
you need it.
>29) There is always one more imbecile than you counted on.
>30) Experience is a wonderful thing. It enables you to recognize a mistake
when you make it again.
Good Humor!! Funny
Is it just me.....or as you get older does the ground get farther and farther away?? Picking up small objects is getting harder every day!!!!
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