If this is your first visit, please click the Sign Up now button to begin the process of creating your account so you can begin posting on our forums! The Sign Up process will only take up about a minute of two of your time.

Follow us on Facebook Follow us on Twitter
Results 1 to 6 of 6
  1. #1

    OT: Andy Rooney's point of view

    Andy Rooney On Prisoners:

    Did you know that it costs forty-thousand dollars a year to house each prisoner? Jeez, for forty-thousand bucks apiece. I'll take a few prisoners into my house. I live in Los Angeles. I already have bars on the windows.

    I don't think we should give free room and board to criminals.

    I think they should have to run twelve hours a day on a treadmill and generate electricity. And if they don't want to run, they can rest in the chair that's hooked up to the generator.


    Andy Rooney On Fabric Softeners:

    My wife uses fabric softener. I never knew what that stuff was for. Then I noticed women coming up to me, sniffing, then saying under their breath, Married!" and walking away. Fabric Softeners are how our wives mark their territory. We can take off the ring, but it's hard to get that April fresh scent out of your clothes.


    Andy Rooney On Morning Differences:

    Men and women are different in the morning. We men wake up aroused in the morning. We can't help it. We just wake up and we want you. And the women are thinking, 'How can he want me the way I look in the morning?'

    It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.


    Andy Rooney On Phone-In-Polls:

    You know those shows where people call in and vote on different issues?

    Did you ever notice there's always like 18% that say "I don't know." It costs 90 cents to call up and vote and they're voting "I don't know."

    "Honey, I feel very strongly about this. Give me the phone."

    Says Into Phone "I DON'T KNOW!"

    (Hangs up looking proud.) Sometimes you have to stand up for what you believe you're not sure about." This guy probably calls up phone sex girls for $2.95 to say "I'm not in the mood."


    Andy Rooney On Cripes:

    My wife's from the Midwest. Very nice people there. Very wholesome. They use words like Cripes'. 'For Cripe's sake.' Who would that be; Jesus Cripe's? The son of 'Gosh' of the church of 'Holy Moly'? I'm not making fun of it. You think I wanna burn in 'Heck'?


    Andy Rooney On Grandma:

    My grandmother has a bumper sticker on her car that says, 'Sexy Senior Citizen.' You don't want to think of your grandmother that way, do you? Out entering wet shawl contests. Makes you wonder where she got that dollar she gave you for your birthday.

  2. #2
    Registered seanclong's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2001
    Chesapeake Bay
    Wet shawl contest. LOL!!!

  3. #3
    Platinum Member Platinum Member CigDaze's Avatar
    My Boats:
    Cigarette 35 Cafe Racer
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
    St. Petersburg, FL
    Too Funny!!!
    The phone thing has me LMAO!

  4. #4
    Registered Risk Taker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2001
    New Hampshuu !!

    Re: OT: Andy Rooney's point of view

    Originally posted by blackhawk
    .........It's because we can't see you. We have no blood anywhere near our optic nerve.


  5. #5
    Registered Shane's Avatar
    My Boats:
    2009 FORMULA 292
    Join Date
    Oct 2000
    Lake George, NY it's not called "Queen of American Lakes" for nothin'!
    Andy's the BEST!

  6. #6
    Registered mxz800's Avatar
    My Boats:
    99 checkmate 270 convincor
    Join Date
    Jul 2001
    Pasadena Md

Similar Threads

  1. Cowboy Point of View
    By Strip Poker 388 in forum General Boating Discussion
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 04-29-2004, 04:22 PM
  2. Packin's Threads, View or Not to View?
    By THRILLSEEKER in forum General Boating Discussion
    Replies: 6
    Last Post: 04-23-2003, 07:42 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:43 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.0
Copyright © 2016 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.1
Original Poster In Postbit provided by Original Poster In Postbit v1.0.0 (Free) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2016 DragonByte Technologies Ltd. Runs best on HiVelocity Hosting.
Copyright 2011 OffShoreOnly. All rights reserved.