LITTLE BILLY ON ...GETTING OLDER
Little BILLY was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the 6th one, a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."
Little BILLY replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
"Oh?" replied the man. " Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"
"No" replied Little Billy, "he minded his own f*cking business!!"
LITTLE BILLY ON... MATH
Little BILLY returns home from school and says he got an "F" in
"Why?" asks the father."
"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2x3?' I said 6," replied BILLY.
"But that's right!" says his dad.
"Yeah, but then she asked me, 'How much is 3x2?'"
"What's the f*cking difference? " asks the father.
"That's what I said!"
LITTLE BILLY ON...ENGLISH:
Little BILLY goes to school, and the teacher says, "Today we are going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does anybody have an example of a multi-syllable word?"
BILLY says " Mas-tur-bate."
Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little BILLY, that's a mouthful."
Little BILLY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're thinking of a blowjob."
LITTLE BILLY ON...GRAMMAR:
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the teacher asked for a show hands from those who could use the word "beautiful" in the same sentence twice.
First she called on little Suzie, who responded with, "My father bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked beautiful in it."
"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then called on little
"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it turned out beautifully."
The teacher responded, "Excellent, Michael!" Then, she reluctantly called on little BILLY.
"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told my father that she was pregnant, and he said "Beautiful, just f*ckingg beautiful!"
LITTLE BAD BOY BILLY WITH THE WORD OF THE DAY.
One day in class the teacher gives and assignment to make a sentence out of the word of the day. "Today's word of the day is indefinently", she days to the class and asks who can make a sentence out of this word.
Little Bad Boy Billy sticks up his hand but the teacher defers from calling on him as she knows he will day something bad. Instead she calls on little Suzy.
Suzy stands up and says, "Due to rain the baseball game was postponed indefinently."
"Very Good Little Suzy," the teacher replies.
She goes through the whole class like this and everytime Little Bad Boy Billy has his hand straining in the air.
Finally she thinks to herself she can recall anything bad with the word indefinently so she calls on Little Bad Boy Billy.
Billy stands up looks the teacher in the eyes and says.....
"When my balls were smacking against her ass, I knew I was in-definently!!!!!!!"
My kind'a Kid....
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