Offshoreonly.com - OT- Joke DeJour

While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over) I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge.
The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry?" I replied, "I'm late for work." "Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"

I responded, "I'm a rectum stretcher." The cop said

"What.....a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?" I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in thereand then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide." The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot *******?"

I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge..."

The ticket - - $ 95.00
The look on his face - - PRICELESS

Sorry Troutly - I couldn't resist
;)