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OT: Do YOU Need a sign?

Old 10-04-2002, 07:40 AM
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Talking OT: Do YOU Need a sign?

Stupid people should have to wear signs that say "I'm Stupid." That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, "Excuse me...oops...didn't see your sign."

It's like before my wife and I moved. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul in the driveway. My neighbor comes over and says, "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack up all our stuff once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign."

A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lift this big ol' stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope. Talked 'em in to giving up. Here's your sign."

I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there is only one way to test it. "Alright, Jimmy, you got the shark suit on, it looks good... They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, alright, but hold my sign I don't wanna lose it."

Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three all swelled right up on me. Here's your sign."

We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over to the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house, he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then says, "Darn, that's hot!" See, if he'd been wearing his sign I could have stopped him.

I learned to drive an 18-wheeler in my days of adventure. Wouldn't you know, I misjudged the height of a bridge. The truck got stuck and I couldn't get it out, no matter how hard I tried. I radioed in for help and eventually a local cop shows up to take the report. He went through his basic questioning...okay...no problem. I thought for sure he was clear of needing a sign until he asked, "So, is your truck stuck?" I couldn't resist. I looked at him, looked back at my rig, looked back at him and said, "No, I'm delivering a bridge...here's your sign."

I stayed late at work one night and a co-worker looked at me and said, "Are you still here?" "No, I left about 10 minutes ago, here's your sign."

Anybody you know need a sign today? The next time someone says something stupid, ask them where their sign is.
Shane is offline  
Old 10-04-2002, 08:05 AM
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SHANE - The "sign" is old technology... when I bought my Ford Van from Metro ford, and I still don't remember when they did it.... The dealer put a stamp on my forehead that said "STUPID"... but it only showed up at thier service desk under thier light.... I know this because every time I had a warranty issue... and there were many.... they tried to convince me it didn't fall under the 3-36 BUMPER TO BUMPER warranty.....
 
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