A young hotshot gets a job with the Tax Office. His first assignment is
to audit an old rabbi. He thinks he'll have a little fun with the old rabbi,
so he says, "Rabbi, what do you do with the drippings from the candles?"
The rabbi says, "We send them to the candle factory, and every once in a
while they send us a free candle."
The kid says, "And what do you do with the crumbs from your table?"
The rabbi says, "We send them to the matzoh ball factory, and every once
in a while they send us a free box of matzoh balls."
The kid says, "And what do you do with the foreskins from your
The rabbi says, "We send them to the Tax Office, and every once in a
while they send us a little prick like you."
So, the owner of this pharmacy walks in to find a guy leaning heavily
against a wall.
The owner asks the assistant "What's with that guy over there by the wall?"
The assistant goes "Well, he came in here this morning to get something for
his cough. I couldn't find the cough syrup, so I gave him an entire bottle
The pharmacist goes "You idiot!" You can't treat a cough with a bottle of
The assistant goes "Of course you can! Look at him; he's afraid to cough!"
A man walks up to a female colleague in his office each day. Making a point
of standing very close to her, he draws a deep breath through his nose,
pauses, smiles, and tells her how wonderful her hair smells. After a week of
this, she can't stand it any longer. The woman marches into her supervisor's
office, tells him about the "hair thing", and that she wants to file a
sexual harassment suit against the man.
The supervisor is puzzled, and struggles to understand what the problem is.
He asks her, "What's sexually threatening about a man telling you that your
hair smells nice?"
The woman screams : "He's a DWARF!"
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