If this is your first visit, please click the Sign Up now button to begin the process of creating your account so you can begin posting on our forums! The Sign Up process will only take up about a minute of two of your time.

Follow us on Facebook Follow us on Twitter
Results 1 to 9 of 9
  1. #1
    Registered Risk Taker's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2001
    New Hampshuu !!

    Talking OT: Showering - Men vs Women

    How to Shower Like a Woman

    1. Take off clothing and place it in sectioned laundry hamper
    according to lights and darks.

    2. Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. If you see
    husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.

    3. Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental
    note to do more sit-ups.

    4. Get in the shower. Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth,
    long loofah, wide loofah, and pumice stone.

    5. Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo
    with 43 added vitamins.

    6. Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean.

    7. Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner
    enhanced with natural avocado oil. Leave on hair for 15

    8. Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10
    minutes until red.

    9. Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake
    body wash.

    10. Rinse conditioner off hair.

    11. Shave armpits and legs

    12. Turn off shower

    13. Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. Spray mold spots
    with Tilex.

    14. Get out of shower. Dry with towel the size of a small country.
    Wrap hair in super absorbent towel.

    15. Check entire body for zits, tweeze hairs.

    16. Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on

    17. If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed


    How To Shower Like a Man

    1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and
    leave them in a pile.

    2. Walk naked to the bathroom. If you see wife along the way,
    shake wiener at her making the 'woo-woo' sound.

    3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size
    of your wiener and scratch your ass.

    4. Get in the shower.

    5. Wash your face

    6. Wash your armpits

    7. Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them

    8. Make fart noises (real or artificial) and laugh at how loud
    they sound in the shower.
    9. Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding

    10. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs stuck on
    the soap.

    11. Shampoo your hair.

    12. Make a Shampoo Mohawk.

    13. Pee.

    14. Rinse off and get out of shower.

    15. Partially dry off. Fail to notice water on floor because
    curtain was hanging out of tub the whole time.

    16. Admire wiener size in mirror again.

    17. Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan

    18. Return to bedroom with towel around your waist. If you
    pass wife, pull off towel, shake wiener at her and make the
    'woo-woo' sound again.

    19. Throw wet towel on bed.

  2. #2
    Registered Shane's Avatar
    My Boats:
    2009 FORMULA 292
    Join Date
    Oct 2000
    Lake George, NY it's not called "Queen of American Lakes" for nothin'!

  3. #3
    Registered HyperBaja's Avatar
    My Boats:
    1990 Baja 190 DSR
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Lewis Center, Ohio
    LOL, but yall use shampoo? Try Dial liquid soap, works lots better for the mohawks.

  4. #4
    Registered Aqua-Holic's Avatar
    My Boats:
    Nada at the present time
    Join Date
    Jan 2002
    Delaware, Ohio
    It actually brought tears to my eyes, just beautiful!!!


  5. #5
    Registered thunderdan's Avatar
    My Boats:
    37 Active Thunder
    Join Date
    Oct 2000
    medford, nj usa
    holy chit was that funny, I actually started to cry it was so funny....

  6. #6
    DyD is offline
    Registered DyD's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2002
    Fort Lauderdale
    That was really good,

  7. #7
    Registered nitro's Avatar
    My Boats:
    2003 skater 368
    Join Date
    Oct 2002
    phoenix, arizona

    Heading to the show as we speak "woo - woo"

  8. #8
    Platinum Member Platinum Member CigDaze's Avatar
    My Boats:
    Cigarette 35 Cafe Racer
    Join Date
    Jun 2001
    St. Petersburg, FL

  9. #9
    Registered florida gator's Avatar
    My Boats:
    1996 Wellcraft Scarab Sport & 1990 Donzi GT210
    Join Date
    Sep 2002
    Clearwater, Florida
    When the pregnant one asked why I was laughing so hard, I read it to her. I could hardly read it out loud. She said "you don't pee in the shower do you"? Of course not!

Similar Threads

  1. That old men vs women thing again...
    By MikeStar in forum General Boating Discussion
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 11-23-2007, 08:55 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:42 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.0
Copyright © 2016 vBulletin Solutions, Inc. All rights reserved.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.1
Original Poster In Postbit provided by Original Poster In Postbit v1.0.0 (Free) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2016 DragonByte Technologies Ltd. Runs best on HiVelocity Hosting.
Copyright 2011 OffShoreOnly. All rights reserved.