Phantom1

The Nun teaching Sunday School was speaking
to her class and she asked the question, "When you die and go to Heaven, which part of your body goes first?"

Suzie raised her hand and said, "I think it's
your hands."

"Why do you think it's your hands, Suzie?"

Suzie replied, "... Because when you pray, you
hold your hands together in front of you and
God just takes your hands first!"

What a wonderful answer!" the Nun said.

Little Johnny raised his hand and said, "Sister,
I think it's your legs".

The Nun looked at him with the strangest look
on her face. "Now, Little Johnny, why do you
think it would be your legs?"

Little Johnny said, "Well, I walked into Mommy
and Daddy's bedroom the other night, Mommy had
her legs straight up in the air and she was
screaming, 'O God I'm coming!' If Dad hadn't had
her pinned down, we'd have lost her."

The Nun fainted .......

CigDaze

LOL!

animalhouse

THE CABBIE AND THE NUN
> >
> >
> > > *A cabbie picks up a nun. She gets into the cab, and the cab driver
> won't*
> > >
> > > *stop staring at her. She asks him why is he staring and he replies, I
> > > have a
> > > *
> > > *question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."
> > > *
> > > *She answers, "My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as
> I
> > am
> > > *
> > > *and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance to see and hear
> > > just
> > > *
> > > *about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask
> that
> > I
> > > *
> > > *would find offensive."
> > > *
> > > *Well, I've always had a fantasy what it would be like to kiss a nun."
> > > *
> > > *She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that, but first:
> > > #1. you
> > > *
> > > *have to be single and #2. you must be Catholic."
> > > *
> > > *
> > > *
> > > *The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I am single and I'm
> > > *
> > > *Catholic too! "
> > > *
> > > *OK" the nun says "Pull into the next alley."
> > > *
> > > *He does and the nun fulfills his fantasy with a kiss that would make a
> > > *
> > > *hooker blush.
> > > *
> > > *But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying.
> > > *
> > > *My dear child, said the nun, why are you crying?"
> > > *
> > > *"Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, I'm
> > married
> > > *
> > > *and I'm Jewish."
> > > *
> > > *The nun says, "That's OK, my name is Bruce and I'm on my way to a
> > Halloween
> > > *
> > > *party."*

Phantom1

Not a good day for Nuns.........