A*skinny little white guy goes into an elevator, looks up and sees this
HUGE African American guy standing next to him. The big guy sees the
little guy staring at him, looks down and says: "7 feet tall, 350
pounds, 20 inch penis, 3 pound left testicle, 3 pound right testicle,
The small man faints dead away and falls to the floor. The big guy
kneels down and brings him to, shaking him. The big fellow says,
wrong with you?" In a weak voice the little guy says, "What EXACTLY
you say to me?" The big dude says, "I saw the curious look and figured
I'd just give you the answers to the questions everyone always asks me.
I'm 7 feet tall, I weigh 350 pounds, I have a 20 inch penis, my left
testicle weighs 3 pounds, my right testicle weighs 3 pounds and my name
is Turner Brown."
The small guy says, "Turner Brown? Thank God! I thought you said
A man and a woman, who have never met before, find themselves assigned to the same sleeping room on a transcontinental train. Though initially embarrassed and uneasy over sharing a room, the two retire and fall asleep quickly. He is in the upper bunk and she is in the lower bunk. At 1:00 AM, he leans over and gently wakes the woman saying: "Ma'am, I'm sorry to bother you, but would you be willing to reach into the closet to get me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold."
"I have a better idea," she replies. "Just for tonight, let's pretend that we're married."
"Wow! That's a great idea!!" he exclaims.
"Good," she replies. "Get your own damn blanket!"
After a moment of silence, he farted.
Originally Posted by PhantomChaos
Rotflmao!!!!! :d :d
#1 was great, always a good one.
#2, Sorry Ron, but Norty trumped ya. It happens to all of us.
A man came home from work, sat down in his favorite chair, turned on the TV, and said to his wife, "Quick, bring me a beer before it starts."
She looked a little puzzled, but brought him a beer.
When he finished it, he said, "Quick, bring me another beer. It's gonna start."
This time she looked a little angry, but brought him a beer.
When it was gone, he said, "Quick, another beer before it starts."
"That's it!" She blows her top, "You bastard! You waltz in here, flop your fat ass down, don't even say hello to me and then expect me to run around like your slave. Don't you realize that I cook and clean and wash and iron all day long?"
The husband sighed. "Oh $hit, it's started."
Last one is the best
Put your best foot forward!
That last one . . . . for those of us who are married . . . . oh my god.
I like Phantoms best, my vote is for the second.
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