Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

Tom I was just talking to some one the other day about your baot. We met up in Newport Beach one day, Nort and all the Poodles were afraid to go out then you cam in in your rig :D . Glad you are back on the board. Hope you stay around!!

Jon

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

Don't know you, but good to have you back..........

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

Tom -

The rules have changed since you left OSO. You HAVE to be a little nuts to be one of us anyway!

Seriously, I've missed the BPD thing but had a nasty bout with cancer 3 years ago (3 years cancer free this past October 21). So I can identify with lost tome.

Welcome back (even if it might be to our version of the Dark Side!)

Barry

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

Thanks for the offer Nort, I could really use the ride. One craziness I know we all share is ever since I was a little boy my head would turn towards every boat I saw - still does no matter if it is a race boat or a dinghy. I can see myself having fun in every one of them, but right now can really see myself in your boat that I didn't get a chance to ride in that day.

A wise man once said "We are all crazy, we just hang out with people that have similar craziness so we don't notice." I wish I was only crazy about boats...

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

Welcome back Tom, glad to see you are back at it. Hang in there, I know you were going through some tough stuff before you left, getting the boat back on the water will probably take you a long way forward.

Wanna hear something really crazy?
 

I decided it was time for me to come back into the world of my friends at OSO because I somehow felt that getting back into boating and having friends would help me in times of need. I posted my original message at around 8 last night and you cannot believe what a difference you all made in welcoming me back - even those who don't even know me!

Turns out it made a way bigger difference than you can imagine. I chatted for an hour with packinair on IM during a particularly bad crisis and he also helped so much.

AS it turns out, I found out a half hour after my first post that my best friend killed himself. He did not have bipolar as far as I know, but 40% of us bipolars attempt suicide and half succeed. It is something I deal with every day. I assure you that platitudes about 'it is the cowards way out' or 'think of those you leave behind', etc. only piss us off even more because you have no idea how dark it can get to the point that the only way out is to do the thing that we are somehow wired to NOT do more than any other thing in life.

I run free support groups one of the many functions of my not-for-profit organization and one theme I hear over and over is that we seek empathy, not sympathy. The difference being we don't want to be felt sorry for, just understood. One of the worst aspects of our craziness is that we don't feel understood or accepted and combined with our paranoia, delusions, hallucinations, and inability to handle our mood swings, it is a deadly brew.

I am still trying to sort it out (may never really get there) and don't know why I am even saying all this... suffice it to say that your friendship may turn out to literally mean the world to me and I appreciate it very much.

Tom

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

Welcome back TOM! We are all crazy in our own ways. I know I am for sure.

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

TOM sorry about your friend :( glade to see you back ,do you see a doc, or just your support groups. my doc tried me on stattera, ritalin, and with them zoloft :( I thought it was a waste of time didn't seem to work so I stopped going altogether. so I am forcing myself to be positive, and get up in the morings which can be real tuff if I don't have smething planned ,does any of the meds work for you or just group meetings, any idears? well come back art

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

Wasn't a member back then, but welcome back.

Re: Whatever happened to Tom who went crazy?
 

My shrink has me on lithium and it works pretty good for my head, but has me puking half the time and a headache the other half. Here in California I can get a prescription for marijuana, which helps with the puking, headaches, and lack of sex drive caused by the lithium. I also take ativan as a sleep aid and it puts me right out. My wife and I have an agreement that if I stay up all night tonight I have to take ativan the next night to make sure my sleep pattern does not get messed up - the number one cause of people (including me) becoming too manic and and doing something that would really get me in trouble...

I have actually grown more in the last couple of years than the first 47. In many ways bipolar is the best thing that ever happened to me which is why I wrote a book called 'The Bipolar Advantage' to try to help people understand that it is not a disease as much as a condition that has both good and bad aspects. Many very successful people are (were for the dead ones like Lincoln) bipolar and some of the traits like creativity and endless energy contributed to their success. Mine is the first book to look at the positive side of bipolar while acknowledging it is a living hell at the same time.