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If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

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Old 12-16-2005, 11:15 PM
  #71
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

Cleverly hidden within this letter, for added incentive to read onward, is one lie. Not a lie of statistical or grammatical error, but a ludicrous falsehood at once so absurd as to strike the reader as an insult to human intelligence, and yet so arrogant as to convince the reader that I'm oversimplifying things a little here. Before I begin, let me point out that when people say that bigotry and hate are alive and well, they're right. And Mr. Nort is to blame. For the moment, he makes no secret of the fact that his factotums are unified under a common goal. That goal is to fleece us. Everything Nort tells you is a lie. Am I aware of how Nort will react when he reads that last sentence? Yes. Do I care? No, because what we're involved in with him is not a game. It's the most serious possible business, and every serious person -- every person with any shred of a sense of responsibility -- must concern himself with it.

I receive a great deal of correspondence from people all over the world. And one of the things that impresses me about it is the massive number of people who realize that Nort frequently avers his support of democracy and his love of freedom. But one need only look at what Nort is doing -- as opposed to what he is saying -- to understand his true aims. He hates people who have huge supplies of the things he lacks. What Nort lacks the most is common sense, which underlies my point that his reasoning is circular and therefore invalid. In other words, he always begins an argument with his conclusion (e.g., that temperamental proponents of voyeurism have dramatically lower incidences of cancer, heart attacks, heart disease, and many other illnesses than the rest of us) and therefore -- not surprisingly -- he always arrives at that very conclusion. Ignorance is bliss. This may be why his minions are generally all smiles.

Nort's principles are one part fanaticism, two parts pharisaism. So let Nort call me disgusting. I call him insensitive. Even if he is not conscious of the inner reason for his metanarratives, it would be nugatory to discuss his scare tactics without first mentioning that his biases have earned him opprobrium, suspicion, resentment, and hatred. It is also worthy of note that he thinks that national-security interests can and should be sidestepped whenever his personal interests are at stake. Of course, thinking so doesn't make it so. It seems to me that Nort is both confused and selfish. Now there's a dangerous combination if I've ever seen one.

Nort drops the names of famous people whenever possible. That makes him sound smarter than he really is and obscures the fact that every so often, you'll see Nort lament, flog himself, cry mea culpa for seeking to increase society's cycle of hostility and violence, and vow never again to be so judgmental. Sadly, he always reverts to his old behavior immediately afterwards, making me think that I want nothing more -- or less -- than to shoo him away like the annoying bug that he is. To that task I have consecrated my life, and I invite you to do likewise. The first thing we need to do is to get Nort to admit that he has a problem. He should be counseled to recite the following:

* I, Nort, am a prudish reprobate.
* I have been a participant in a giant scheme to rob, steal, cheat, and murder.
* I hereby admit my addiction to Dadaism. I ask for the strength and wisdom to fight this addiction.

Once Nort realizes that he has a problem, maybe then he'll see that when a friend wants to drive inebriated, you try to stop him. Well, Nort is drunk with power, which is why we must stand up and fight for our heritage, traditions, and values.

Nort not only lies, but he brags about his lying to his drones. His spin doctors get a thrill out of protesting. They have no idea what causes they're fighting for or against. For them, going down to the local protest, carrying a sign, hanging out with Nort, and meeting some other nugatory lunkheads is merely a social event. They're not even aware that Nort's newsgroup postings cannot stand on their own merit. That's why they're dependent on elaborate artifices and explanatory stories to convince us that the most lazy scapegraces I've ever seen are more deserving of honor than our nation's war heroes.

Still, I can reword my point as follows. Nort's popularity is overrated. Nort says that everyone would be a lot safer if he were to monitor all of our personal communications and financial transactions -- even our library records. Why on Earth does Nort need to monitor our library records? First, I'll give you a very brief answer and then I'll go back and explain my answer in detail. As for the brief answer, the purpose of this letter is far greater than to prove to you how covinous and nerdy Nort has become. The purpose of this letter is to get you to start thinking for yourself, to start thinking about how my cause is to lift the fog from his thinking. I call upon men and women from all walks of life to support my cause with their life-affirming eloquence and indomitable spirit of human decency and moral righteousness. Only then will the whole world realize that if it were up to Nort, schoolchildren would be taught reading, 'riting, and racism.

It is as if we were safely on the bank of a raging river, enjoying a picnic with our friends and family, when a bunch of vapid psychics came along and threw us into the river. Not only must we must struggle to avoid drowning in the raging torrent of Nort-sponsored careerism, but we must crawl out of the river before we can raise unambitious reprobates out of their cultural misery and lead them to the national community as a valuable, united factor. Although I respect his right to free speech just as I respect it for socially inept traitors, hypocritical, obstreperous masters of deceit, and narrow-minded weasels, no matter how bad you think Nort's comments are, I assure you that they are far, far worse than you think. His prank phone calls deserve to be criticized because they pit the haves against the have-nots. The pen is a powerful tool. Why don't we use that tool to direct our efforts toward clearly defined goals and measure progress toward those goals as frequently and as objectively as possible? I am cognizant that I take no part in any argument over these or any other views, but this is not the first time I've wanted to upbraid Nort for being so callow. But it is the first time I realized that while we do nothing, those who encourage men to leave their wives, kill their children, practice witchcraft, destroy capitalism, and become what I call hideous, overbearing hoodlums are gloating and smirking. And they will keep on gloating and smirking until we review the basic issues at the root of the debate.

Regular readers of my letters probably take that for granted, but if I am to hinder the power of lubricious, academicism-oriented dole-sucking parasites like Nort, I must explain to the population at large that in the Old Testament, the Book of Kings relates how the priests of Baal were slain for deceiving the people. I'm not suggesting that there be any contemporary parallel involving Nort, but if anything will free us from the shackles of Nort's brown-nosing, wayward modes of thought, it's knowledge of the world as it really is. It's knowledge that even when he isn't lying, Nort's using facts, emphasizing facts, bearing down on facts, sliding off facts, quietly ignoring facts, and, above all, interpreting facts in a way that will enable him to dismantle national civil rights organizations by driving a wedge between the leaders and the rank-and-file members.

Viewed from all angles, Nort sometimes uses the word "tetraiodophenolphthalein" when describing his communications. Beware! This is a buzzword designed for emotional response. He and his bootlickers pay little or no attention to the negative impact that terrorism will have on our daily lives, don't you think? Wanting to flout all of society's rules is one thing, but why would anybody possibly want to devise pusillanimous scams to get money for nothing? The most appealing theory has to do with the way that I am sick of our illustrious "leaders" treading on eggshells so as not to upset Nort. Here's what I have to say to them: Nort somehow manages to maintain a straight face when saying that everyone with a different set of beliefs from his is going to get a one-way ticket to Hell. I am greatly grieved by this occurrence of falsehood and fantastic storytelling which is the resultant of layers of social dishevelment and disillusionment amongst the fine citizens of a once organized, motivated, and cognitively enlightened civilization. He claims that arriving at a true state of comprehension is too difficult and/or time-consuming. I would say that that claim is 70% folderol, 20% twaddle, and 10% another impractical attempt to interfere with the most important principles of democracy. Please, please, please help me chastise Nort for not doing any research before spouting off. Without your help, Nort will truly make my blood curdle. To end on a more positive note: Mr. Nort's new definition of "counterexpostulation" is in disagreement with his illiterate shell games.
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Old 12-16-2005, 11:31 PM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

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Originally Posted by FREEDOM US1
The boats doing 81mph through the water. Down stream the GPS will read 85mph. Up stream the GPS reading will be 77mph. You guys probably know this but some of your answers were starting to scare me. This answer is for flat water and no wind. I hope this makes since to somebody.
You must make sure the rpm's are the same in both directions to get an accurate comparison. You've brought in a whole new factor talking about through the water speed.

So, with a 4 mph current:
85mph GPS downstream= 81mph through water downstream
81mph GPS upstream= 85mph through water upstream
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Old 12-16-2005, 11:37 PM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

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Originally Posted by PhantomChaos
If I'm on my boat, on the river going down-stream with a 4mph current, how fast am I going if the GPS says 85mph?
Ok I have it, Your not on your boat if your going 85. heh heh heh
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Old 12-16-2005, 11:44 PM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

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Originally Posted by PhantomChaos
If I'm on my boat, on the river going down-stream with a 4mph current, how fast am I going if the GPS says 85mph?
You're going 81mph (through) the water and 85mph past the trees that are stuck in the land...
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Old 12-17-2005, 03:06 AM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

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What's a Whipple?????
craig they are those four things you got rid of on your boat...is the boat any faster now that its lighter
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Old 12-17-2005, 07:46 AM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

Quote:
Originally Posted by FREEDOM US1
The boats doing 81mph through the water. Down stream the GPS will read 85mph. Up stream the GPS reading will be 77mph. You guys probably know this but some of your answers were starting to scare me. This answer is for flat water and no wind. I hope this makes since to somebody.
If it was truly flat water, there would be no current

The only numbers you can be sure of are
1/ his speed was 85
2/his speed relative to the water was probably 81, not that he asked
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Old 12-17-2005, 07:48 AM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

you're going 85, regardless of any current, it is only measuring the speed of travel of the boat.
ex 1: you are going down river at 85 mph, if the current is pushing you, youare still doing 85 mph, as the gps is only reading your boat, not the water conditions... the boat is the constant, so thats all a gps does is report the constant.

ex : you are traveling up river against a current, gps says 81, you are still only going 81 because the gps reads the only constant.

if you have gps in a car, it doesnt adjust your speed when you go uphill...it just reads the constant...now take off your thinking caps
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Old 12-17-2005, 09:29 AM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

I thought it always depended on the size of the motor in the tow vehicle.
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Old 12-17-2005, 09:46 AM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

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Originally Posted by GLH
Cleverly hidden within this letter, for added incentive to read onward, is one lie. Not a lie of statistical or grammatical error, but a ludicrous falsehood at once so absurd as to strike the reader as an insult to human intelligence, and yet so arrogant as to convince the reader that I'm oversimplifying things a little here. Before I begin, let me point out that when people say that bigotry and hate are alive and well, they're right. And Mr. Nort is to blame. For the moment, he makes no secret of the fact that his factotums are unified under a common goal. That goal is to fleece us. Everything Nort tells you is a lie. Am I aware of how Nort will react when he reads that last sentence? Yes. Do I care? No, because what we're involved in with him is not a game. It's the most serious possible business, and every serious person -- every person with any shred of a sense of responsibility -- must concern himself with it.


GL, my eyes are out of their orbits...
to much of english/french dictionnary for this morning... I am going back to sleep!
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Old 12-17-2005, 09:54 AM
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Default Re: If the GPS says 85mph, how fast am I going?

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GL, my eyes are out of their orbits...
to much of english/french dictionnary for this morning... I am going back to sleep!
I love this site...

http://www.pakin.org/complaint
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