Offshoreonly.com - Just a little humor

Life Explained
On the first day God created the cow. God said, "You must
go to field with the farmer all day long and suffer under the sun, have calves and give milk to support the farmer. I will give you a life span of sixty years."

The cow said, "That's kind of a tough life you want me to live for sixty years. Let me have twenty years and I'll give back the her forty."

And God agreed.

On the second day, God created the dog. God said, "Sit all day by the door of your house and bark at anyone who comes in or walks out. I
will give you a life span of twenty years."

The dog said, "That's too long to be barking. Give me ten
years and
I'll give back the other ten."
So God agreed (sigh).
On the third day God created the monkey. God said,
"Entertain
>people,
do monkey tricks, make them laugh. I'll give you a twenty
year life span."
Monkey said, "How boring, monkey tricks for twenty years? I
don't
> think so. Dog gave you back ten, so that's what I'll do too,
okay?"
And God agreed again.

On the fourth day God created man. God said, "Eat, sleep,
play,
have
sex, enjoy. Do nothing, just enjoy, enjoy. I'll give you
twenty
years."

Man said, "What? Only twenty years? No way man. Tell you
what,
>I'll
take my twenty, and the forty cow gave back, and the ten dog
gave
back
and the ten monkey gave back. That makes eighty, okay?"

Okay," said God. "You've got a deal."
So that is why for the first twenty years we eat, sleep, have great
sex, enjoy, and do nothing; for the next forty years we slave
in the
sun to support our family; for the next ten years we do
monkey
tricks
to entertain our grandchildren; and for the last ten years we
sit in
front of the house and bark at everybody.