7 morons... {humor}
01-21-2002, 03:59 PM
#1
VIP Member
7 morons... {humor}
Some of these are old, but they are all good ones.
1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
AT&T FIRED President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked
intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.
Perhaps it’s not Walter who’s lacking intelligence.
2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland, California
spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself
inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers
discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line,
shouting “Please come out and give yourself up.”
3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and
forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein
the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.
4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and asked
for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so
he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three
hours until police showed up and grabbed him.
5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery
suspect who just couldn’t control himself during a lineup. When
detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, “Give me
all your money or
I’ll shoot,” the man shouted, “That’s not what I said!”
6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?? A man spoke frantically into the phone, “My
wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her
first child?” the doctor asked. “No!”, the man shouted, “This is her husband!”.
7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto, California, Steven
Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch
withot a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun, but
unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
Brian
1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP?
AT&T FIRED President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked
intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package.
Perhaps it’s not Walter who’s lacking intelligence.
2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: Police in Oakland, California
spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself
inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers
discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line,
shouting “Please come out and give yourself up.”
3. WHAT WAS PLAN B???
An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and
forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein
the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.
4. THE GETAWAY! A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop, and asked
for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so
he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three
hours until police showed up and grabbed him.
5. DID I SAY THAT??? Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery
suspect who just couldn’t control himself during a lineup. When
detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words, “Give me
all your money or
I’ll shoot,” the man shouted, “That’s not what I said!”
6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING?? A man spoke frantically into the phone, “My
wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!” “Is this her
first child?” the doctor asked. “No!”, the man shouted, “This is her husband!”.
7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED!! In Modesto, California, Steven
Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch
withot a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun, but
unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket.
Brian
Charter Member
