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Political Correctness - My first humor contribution to OSO

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Old 01-25-2002, 12:27 PM
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Cool Political Correctness - My first humor contribution to OSO

HOW TO TALK ABOUT WOMEN and STILL BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED AMERICAN

She is not a BLEACHED BLONDE - She is PEROXIDE DEPENDENT

She is not a BAD COOK - She is MICROWAVE COMPATIBLE

She is not HALF-NAKED - She is WARDROBE IMPAIRED

She does not wear TOO MUCH JEWELRY - She is METABOLICALLY OVERBURDENED

She is not CONCEITED - She is INTIMATELY AWARE OF HER BEST QUALITIES

She does not GAIN WEIGHT - She is a METABOLIC UNDERACHIEVER

She is not a SCREAMER or MOANER - She is VOCALLY APPRECIATIVE

She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE

She does not TEASE or FLIRT - She engages in ARTIFICIAL STIMULATION

She is not TOO SKINNY - She is SKELETALLY PROMINENT

She is not KINKY - She is a NON INHIBITED SEXUAL COMPANION

She does not WEAR TOO MUCH MAKEUP - She has reached COSMETIC SATURATION

She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is GRAVITY RESISTANT

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

HOW TO TALK ABOUT MEN and STILL BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:

He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID GRAIN STORAGE FACILITY

He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN

He doesn't GET LOST ALL THE TIME - He investigates ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS

He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICULAR REGRESSION

He is not a CRADLE ROBBER - He prefers GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL RELATIONSHIPS

He does not get FALLING DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL

He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops a case of RECTAL-CRANIAL INVERSION

He is not a SEX MACHINE - He is ROMANTICALLY AUTOMATED

He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY

He does not UNDRESS YOU WITH HIS EYES - He has an INTROSPECTIVE PORNOGRAPHIC MEMENT

He is not AFFRAID OF COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED
 
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Old 01-25-2002, 12:36 PM
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Cool!
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Old 01-25-2002, 01:16 PM
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Old 01-25-2002, 01:21 PM
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Not bad, not bad at all...so I say
 
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Old 01-25-2002, 01:26 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Troutly:
<STRONG>They work for me so I'll give 'em three </STRONG>
A poet joke critic.....what a combo
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Old 01-25-2002, 01:28 PM
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For the joke and for Troutly's haiku...

Sean
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Old 01-25-2002, 01:30 PM
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Old 01-28-2002, 08:07 PM
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Old 01-28-2002, 08:14 PM
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, Haiku...there's a word I have not heard (in a while)
 
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Old 01-28-2002, 10:13 PM
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__________________
“He who is unaware of his ignorance will be only misled by his knowledge.”

ΜΟΛΩΝ ΛΑΒΈ!
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