Stupidest Boat related thing you did in 2002
12-31-2002, 08:35 PM
#41
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a buddy and i are parking the boat in his side yard at his house at loto. the first 40 ft. are nice and level. past that it starts downhill at a very steep grade for the next 1/2 mile till you reach the lake. nothing but trees and weeds and an old fake well gazebo looking structure that just the day before my buddy said he wanted to tear down. well its not the first time we have done this but for some reason "cc & 7" we backed in alittle further then before. unhook the trailer from the truck , start walking back to cover her up and she slowly starts to walk with me.
ohhh chit! grab the trailer and dig my heels in like thats goin to slow it down. 
NOT. bout now my buddy grabs on the other side and digs in. nothing happens except were moving faster now plowing his yard with are tennis shoe heels. complete panic and terror set in and i let go knowing she wont stop till she's in the lake or hits a tree on the way down.suddenly she stops dead in her tracks after hitting and knocking down the gazebo.one of the 4 X 4 post lodged itself under the trailer and stopped her. 
after changing my underwear we looked at the bright side , no gazebo to tear down and no damage to boat or trailer
ohhh chit! grab the trailer and dig my heels in like thats goin to slow it down. NOT. bout now my buddy grabs on the other side and digs in. nothing happens except were moving faster now plowing his yard with are tennis shoe heels. complete panic and terror set in and i let go knowing she wont stop till she's in the lake or hits a tree on the way down.suddenly she stops dead in her tracks after hitting and knocking down the gazebo.one of the 4 X 4 post lodged itself under the trailer and stopped her. after changing my underwear we looked at the bright side , no gazebo to tear down and no damage to boat or trailer
12-31-2002, 11:35 PM
#42
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the only thing I am going to say about stupid happenings is that no one will ever see me and my boat together again at
BACKWATERJACKS at LOTO
BACKWATERJACKS at LOTO
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This Cat is trying to keep up with the Big Dogs
This Cat is trying to keep up with the Big Dogs
12-31-2002, 11:42 PM
#43
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Secret formula and his antifreeze pumping and lotoparty get my vote. Man, that's funny s***!!!!!!
Me, I left the drain plug in, probably the first time I ever did that, and it happened to be on a weekend when I took the boat back to my house to work on it, and did not take it to indoor storage. Welp, we got like 2 1/2 inches of rain. I go to air out the boat the next day and discover water up and OVER the stringer where the motor mounts are bolted!!!!! Quick lube job and everything has been fine!!
Me, I left the drain plug in, probably the first time I ever did that, and it happened to be on a weekend when I took the boat back to my house to work on it, and did not take it to indoor storage. Welp, we got like 2 1/2 inches of rain. I go to air out the boat the next day and discover water up and OVER the stringer where the motor mounts are bolted!!!!! Quick lube job and everything has been fine!!
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01-01-2003, 12:29 AM
#45
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Went overnighting upriver with a friend and a customer (who is a friend too). Parked in a "hidden cove" that I only knew how to find with GPS. We rode jetskis all day long and finally ran out of beer. We went back to the Sea Ray and restocked on beer and grabbed some shirts so we could go to the steak house.
Rode jetskis to the steakhouse and had to wait cause it was busy. We ended up sharing a table with 3 drunk chicks. Several trips to the store later (in their car) to get beer, we have ate steak and drank beer and now it is midnight. We turn down their offer to crash at their lake house (we are upstanding drunk married men - and they were kinda ugly) and head back to the jetskis.
It's midnight. Pitch black. We're medicated heavily with Mick Light. This end of the river is fairly desolate and unlit. Also lots of tricky channel changes, and lumber sticking out of the water (trees, limbs, logs, etc.).
We take all variables into account and - off we go!.
Friend headed out first and never looked back.
I waited for customer friend and off we went. We decided to be smart and cut behind the big island for a shortcut (we don't need no water - were driving jet lice...).
We get 600 yards off the dock at 50 plus when my pump loads up with milfoil (a green plant that grows from the bottom and overtakes and chokes water as it "lillypads" all over the surface). My ski drags to a halt, motor revving madly... I **** it down and hear my friend heading down the channel out of sight out of range. Keep in mind it is almost pitch black - only a few points of light from the restaurant illuminating anything...
I do notice I don't hear my other ski (with customer on it). I yell for him and he yells back from a distance "milfoil!".
I swim under the ski with my head out and pull 100 pounds of foilage out of the pump. I get back on and fire it up. 30 feet later I'm back in the same shape. I yell to swim the skis to good water and he agrees. I swim through what feels like a thousand slimy aliens trying to get me with tentacles. Finally I get the couple hundred yards to good water and fire up. Custoimer friend is almost clear too. We have to go back under a time or 2 to get all the vines out then we take off.
It is BLACK. I can only see the white hull spray from his ski from occasional specks of moonlight. We are sometimes close to each other, and sometimes far from each other, but are headed kind of in the same direction. I'm lookin hard for channel markers but never see except for one about 10 feet off my bow that I try to miss but still sideswipe. I run over three logs big enough to get airborne.
About this time I realize I have no idea how far hidden cove is or how long it should take at 35mph to get there (we had gone to the restaurant at wide open close to 55). I wonder if we should just spend the night on one of these snake infested islands instead of die trying to find the boat...
After a bit, I see the ghost of an island and wonder if it is the one we go to the left of or the right. I bear right. I see nothing.
I crash through what feels like a complete log cabin full of furniture. Stuff rips at my arms and my head but the ski keeps going. I cut hard left thinking I see stuff in front of me but I bust right through more lumber. I do pop out the other side and stop to see where Bill is. I cut the motor. I hear nothing. I feel wet and feel like my head is ripped open and like I have no flesh remaining on my arms. I yell for Bill. I hear nothing. I restart the ski and head at what feels like the direction I came from. I run wide open that way for 10 or 15 seconds (If Im gonna bleed to death I might as well go fast) and then chop the throttle and kill the motor. As I coast to a stop I hear yelling right in front of me. I stopped and Bill and Fred were yelling and were 20 feet ahead of me. Fred was off his ski in the water and Bill was sitting on his.
Fred had run thru milfoil and was pump choked. Bill had almost run him over and was also now pump choked. I went to start mine and was quickly pump choked.
Fred had run thru branches too, but had gone too far left into the shallows. We laughed and broke out more beer. Figured we'd better be pickled when the snakes came to eat us...
We cleaned out our pumps and decided to head towards a single light that we figured was on a dock. Felt we all needed to check for injuries. As we headed to the light (a half mile away or so), I hit something in the water and something fell into the footwell of my ski. I knew it was a sleeping bird or a maneating snake, but it was a white plastic flag. I remembered that a flag was close to the hidden cove. We headed to the shoreline and sure enough there was the entrance. We had virtually no light but beer seemed to enhance our night vision (they dont call it LIGHT for nothing). We wound thru the serpentine entrance and in the distance we saw the dark sihouette of the SeaRay. We had not left any lights on since we hadnt planned to be out past dark. We made it to the boat and fired up lights to check to see how close to death we were.
Covered in mossy milfoil like the Creature from the Black LAgoon, we all were. Fred had a bunch of branches poking out all from the front hatch on his seadoo, and mine was missing both mirrors. I had wood sticking out of my vest and Bill had bark in his hair.
We fired up the satellite and watched the Anna Nicole Show and medicated ourselves with more beer.
Lesson learned: next time we bring more beer...
Rode jetskis to the steakhouse and had to wait cause it was busy. We ended up sharing a table with 3 drunk chicks. Several trips to the store later (in their car) to get beer, we have ate steak and drank beer and now it is midnight. We turn down their offer to crash at their lake house (we are upstanding drunk married men - and they were kinda ugly) and head back to the jetskis.
It's midnight. Pitch black. We're medicated heavily with Mick Light. This end of the river is fairly desolate and unlit. Also lots of tricky channel changes, and lumber sticking out of the water (trees, limbs, logs, etc.).
We take all variables into account and - off we go!.
Friend headed out first and never looked back.
I waited for customer friend and off we went. We decided to be smart and cut behind the big island for a shortcut (we don't need no water - were driving jet lice...).
We get 600 yards off the dock at 50 plus when my pump loads up with milfoil (a green plant that grows from the bottom and overtakes and chokes water as it "lillypads" all over the surface). My ski drags to a halt, motor revving madly... I **** it down and hear my friend heading down the channel out of sight out of range. Keep in mind it is almost pitch black - only a few points of light from the restaurant illuminating anything...
I do notice I don't hear my other ski (with customer on it). I yell for him and he yells back from a distance "milfoil!".
I swim under the ski with my head out and pull 100 pounds of foilage out of the pump. I get back on and fire it up. 30 feet later I'm back in the same shape. I yell to swim the skis to good water and he agrees. I swim through what feels like a thousand slimy aliens trying to get me with tentacles. Finally I get the couple hundred yards to good water and fire up. Custoimer friend is almost clear too. We have to go back under a time or 2 to get all the vines out then we take off.
It is BLACK. I can only see the white hull spray from his ski from occasional specks of moonlight. We are sometimes close to each other, and sometimes far from each other, but are headed kind of in the same direction. I'm lookin hard for channel markers but never see except for one about 10 feet off my bow that I try to miss but still sideswipe. I run over three logs big enough to get airborne.
About this time I realize I have no idea how far hidden cove is or how long it should take at 35mph to get there (we had gone to the restaurant at wide open close to 55). I wonder if we should just spend the night on one of these snake infested islands instead of die trying to find the boat...
After a bit, I see the ghost of an island and wonder if it is the one we go to the left of or the right. I bear right. I see nothing.
I crash through what feels like a complete log cabin full of furniture. Stuff rips at my arms and my head but the ski keeps going. I cut hard left thinking I see stuff in front of me but I bust right through more lumber. I do pop out the other side and stop to see where Bill is. I cut the motor. I hear nothing. I feel wet and feel like my head is ripped open and like I have no flesh remaining on my arms. I yell for Bill. I hear nothing. I restart the ski and head at what feels like the direction I came from. I run wide open that way for 10 or 15 seconds (If Im gonna bleed to death I might as well go fast) and then chop the throttle and kill the motor. As I coast to a stop I hear yelling right in front of me. I stopped and Bill and Fred were yelling and were 20 feet ahead of me. Fred was off his ski in the water and Bill was sitting on his.
Fred had run thru milfoil and was pump choked. Bill had almost run him over and was also now pump choked. I went to start mine and was quickly pump choked.
Fred had run thru branches too, but had gone too far left into the shallows. We laughed and broke out more beer. Figured we'd better be pickled when the snakes came to eat us...
We cleaned out our pumps and decided to head towards a single light that we figured was on a dock. Felt we all needed to check for injuries. As we headed to the light (a half mile away or so), I hit something in the water and something fell into the footwell of my ski. I knew it was a sleeping bird or a maneating snake, but it was a white plastic flag. I remembered that a flag was close to the hidden cove. We headed to the shoreline and sure enough there was the entrance. We had virtually no light but beer seemed to enhance our night vision (they dont call it LIGHT for nothing). We wound thru the serpentine entrance and in the distance we saw the dark sihouette of the SeaRay. We had not left any lights on since we hadnt planned to be out past dark. We made it to the boat and fired up lights to check to see how close to death we were.
Covered in mossy milfoil like the Creature from the Black LAgoon, we all were. Fred had a bunch of branches poking out all from the front hatch on his seadoo, and mine was missing both mirrors. I had wood sticking out of my vest and Bill had bark in his hair.
We fired up the satellite and watched the Anna Nicole Show and medicated ourselves with more beer.
Lesson learned: next time we bring more beer...
01-01-2003, 12:44 AM
#46
Registered
Hate to admit to this....Came up the St. Johns here in Central Florida. Two friends and an 18 foot Donzi. We have been drinking for oh............6 hours or so. Good stuff now, Crown Royal.
Heading for Sanford. Spotlight out and running OK. Then the liquior courage hits and my buddy with the spot light decides to spot Owls.
We're running maybe 35-40 mph when the river takes a hard right. I don't see it cause the spot light is in the trees looking for Mr. Hoot Owl. Hit the plants and the beach in FULL reverse.
Boat is about 20 feet on dry land. Engine is turning 6000 rpm. And it is black dark. Lost the spot light when the beach hit.
Pushed boat back in water, fired it up and it overheated. Cleared out water intake and drove, much slower back to trailer.
Never, ever forget that beach with the trees and everything coming at us at 40 mph.
Heading for Sanford. Spotlight out and running OK. Then the liquior courage hits and my buddy with the spot light decides to spot Owls.
We're running maybe 35-40 mph when the river takes a hard right. I don't see it cause the spot light is in the trees looking for Mr. Hoot Owl. Hit the plants and the beach in FULL reverse.
Boat is about 20 feet on dry land. Engine is turning 6000 rpm. And it is black dark. Lost the spot light when the beach hit.
Pushed boat back in water, fired it up and it overheated. Cleared out water intake and drove, much slower back to trailer.
Never, ever forget that beach with the trees and everything coming at us at 40 mph.
01-01-2003, 12:52 AM
#47
Registered
Now this is gettin' interesting! As I near 40 I've stopped wondering why the big man has seen fit to save my LIFE so many times....so much crazy stuff...I'm just thankful he has. Ever wonder why the women get so nervous about just the guys out playing together...cause they know we take chances in the interest of livin' life to the fullest that we never would w/them around!
01-01-2003, 01:31 AM
#48
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Mine was just yesterday, some of you may have read the post about the dumbass award
Anyway yesterday I was in a hurry to clean out the shop for a new years party and while moving the boat I backed it into a forklift and snapped off a K-Plane
Anyway yesterday I was in a hurry to clean out the shop for a new years party and while moving the boat I backed it into a forklift and snapped off a K-Plane
