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My Complaint About "Too Old"
My complaint about Mr. Too Old
I've been hesitating to write this letter, because I've been afraid that, if I did, Mr. Too Old would do everything in his power to make me stampede into the abattoir. But after reading about Mr. Too Old's feral ultimata, I could hesitate no longer. If you disagree with my claim that Mr. Too Old carries the seeds of his own self-destruction, then read no further. Let's consider for a moment, though, that maybe he clings to Fabianism like a drowning man clings to a life preserver. Then doesn't it follow that it is literally the case that there is no justification on any level whatsoever for his choleric slurs? It's a pity that two thousand years after Christ, the voices of confused fomenters of revolution like him can still be heard, worse still that they're listened to, and worst of all that anyone believes them. Mr. Too Old believes that 75 million years ago, a galactic tyrant named Xenu solved the overpopulation problem of his 76-planet federation by transporting the excess people to Earth, chaining them to volcanoes, and dropping H-bombs on them. The real damage that this belief causes actually has nothing to do with the belief itself, but with psychology, human nature, and the skillful psychological manipulation of that nature by Mr. Too Old and his doctrinaire, mad legatees. Given the public appetite for more accountability, he is a loose cannon , and everyone with half a brain understands that. Was Mr. Too Old just trying to be cute when he said that he knows 100% of everything 100% of the time? I sure hope so, because far too many people tolerate his accusations as long as they're presented in small, seemingly harmless doses. What these people fail to realize, however, is that I recently overheard a couple of vicious scoundrels say that honor counts for nothing. Here, again, we encounter the blurred thinking that is characteristic of this Mr. Too Old-induced era of slogans and propaganda. Something recently occurred to me that might occur to Mr. Too Old, as well, if he would just turn down the volume of his voice for a moment: Mr. Too Old is too useless to reason with. Now, I could go off on that point alone, but his spin doctors are too lazy to answer the unambitious politicos who champion censorship in the name of free speech, intolerance in the name of tolerance, and oppression in the name of freedom. They just want to sit back, fasten their mouths on the public teats, and casually forget that Mr. Too Old's reason is not true reason. It does not seek the truth, but only feckless answers, jaundiced resolutions to conflicts. As headlong as Mr. Too Old's apologists may be, they are also jackbooted flibbertigibbets. Never mind that Mr. Too Old reminds me of the thief who cries "Stop, thief!" to distract attention from his thievery. What's really important is that if I recall correctly, I find that some of Mr. Too Old's choices of words in his conclusions would not have been mine. For example, I would have substituted "self-indulgent" for "extraterritoriality" and "petulant" for "scientificogeographical." Did he get dropped on his head when he was young, or did Mr. Too Old take massive doses of drugs to believe that his decisions are based on reason? Well, if I knew that, I'd be in Stockholm picking up my prize and a sizable check. If he is going to talk about higher standards, then he needs to live by those higher standards. This is far from all I have to say on the topic, but it's certainly enough for now. Just remember one thing: The things Mr. Too Old wants to do are unfair, if not illegal. |
W T F :confused:
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Uuuhhhhh, did you catch that Beavis?
:confused: |
Uh.........okay. Let me have some of that stuff too. :confused: :confused: :confused:
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What's this all about?
What did I miss? Is Too Old a scientolegist? Did he piss in Dock's Wheaties? Ron |
can someone tell me what all that meant?:confused:
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It could be a memory leak or memory corruption - try rebooting:confused:
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LOL
Too Old, just pulling your chain dude! You guys have got to check out this link. As a business owner, the customer is always right. Yeah Right!!!!! You have to bite your tongue almost everyday. Well, I have found this really cool website where you put in a guys name and it automatically produces a complaint letter. When I get really pissed, I print one out, read it and usually feel much better. Check it out. http://hugin.sigusr1.org/~pakin/complaint Sorry Fred |
At least he acknowledges him as "MR" LOL
'Dock,, In laymans terms what are you trying to say? |
Originally posted by Too Old Alright Mark......:D :D :D I have the dictionary out and I should have an idea just what in the hell you've said in, oh, let's say about four or five hours.....:D :D :D Somehow, I have the feeling it isn't a compliment.:eek: :p :D LOL, If you can make sense of it in 4-5 hours you are better than me. Check out the link above. Pretty cool. Mark |
I KNEW IT....!!!! Freds whacked :D :D :D
that was cool....although my head is still steaming |
I think it has something to do with Mr Too Old always changing his avatars!
:D |
Originally posted by Thirsty Turtle I think it has something to do with Mr Too Old always changing his avatars! :D |
Thanks...for the ammo .;)
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I bought it, hook, line and a HUGE "jackbooted" sinker. :D :D :D :D :D
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Thats kinda what I was thinking,,, get out the dictionary so I knew what the heck he was sayin !!!!!!!!!!
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OK, I sat there as I read that and said- I can deal with the faking of the death of a member, the multiple screen names, members with hidden agendas, complaints about paying for stuff, being ridiculed by one group or the other for whatever decision I make, etc. But what the **** am I going to do to address this post. I actually thought half way through, I am going to pull the plug on the server, that's it- these people have succeded in driving me insane.
That was a good one, have to admit!! |
Wow even I fell for that shiate.......:rolleyes:
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:D Thanks for that link ;)
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O.K. The funny thing is, I understood every word of that letter. Really. Call me well read, call me over educated, call me whatever you will, but I honestly understood it. Guess that 100 dollar vocabulary is good for something. :) Am I wierd????
I also knew it was a ruse. I've seen that letter before. :D The best reply so far though has to go to OSO!!! Yank the plug!! Yeah right!!!! There'd be a lynch mob heading towards Floriduh the minute it went off the net!!!!! LOL!!!!! |
Just in time..
I was just trying to figure out how to word a consumer complaint to Sony.. Now I have the ammo.. Thanks DOC.. Wow..Just think what will happen when Puder reads it..:D :D :D |
If only I could get all the tears out of my eyes and my sides would just quit hurting..And I don't know which was funnier...the letter or all the responses..now I need Alieve for the headache from laughing so so much Great!!! I just keep trying to picture eveyone reading it and the looks on their faces and going
W T F ?????? |
OMG!!! LOFAO!!!! :D:D:D:D:D
Dock, you did it! I almost fell out of the chair. I honestly sat there in complete puzzlement and disbelief. I had no idea WTF I was reading, but it's funny as $****!!!! :D:D:D Thanks for the link. I'll be using that to it's fullest! |
When I first read this,
all I could think of was: Packin vs. Travis, the sequel.:D :D |
Originally posted by OffshoreOnly OK, I sat there as I read that and said- I can deal with the faking of the death of a member, the multiple screen names, members with hidden agendas, complaints about paying for stuff, being ridiculed by one group or the other for whatever decision I make, etc. But what the **** am I going to do to address this post. I actually thought half way through, I am going to pull the plug on the server, that's it- these people have succeded in driving me insane. That was a good one, have to admit!! |
I was thinking wow Mark is really pissed, so went to link and put in my girls name and printed it out for her to read in morning, does anyone have a couch............good one Mark. Craig
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????????
What are the rest you guys talking about? The only post that makes any sense in this thread is Dock Holiday's first one - I understood it clearly and completely. The rest of this is just gibberish......
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Re: ????????
Originally posted by C_Spray What are the rest you guys talking about? The only post that makes any sense in this thread is Dock Holiday's first one - I understood it clearly and completely. The rest of this is just gibberish...... |
Dued, yank that thermometer out of your a$$ I think you're running a temperature.
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My head hurts...
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Here I am , under the influence of serious cold medication, reading this post. I must have said W--- T-- F---!!! A hundred times. You had me goin' Dock!!!!;)
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Reminded me of college, how many words can I use to say absolutely nothing.:D
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I was waiting for the punch line there. Now I have to go look in the porn section my head hurts, I need something to dumb me up a bit :D:D
Jon |
ok now after doing the site I truly think I should tear and shread into fine little peices the complaint about my boss :)
Just think he may not see the humor in it since he just demoted me for what ever his pathetic reasons where. Which I am finding out it was to make room for someone he LIKED from another company :( Sad for is and somewhat funny for him is it BACKFIRED on him. I now have amo against him with Corporate and the person he wnated declined his offer :) so now they are still with out supervision and the production is way down and the mistakes are way HIGH. already had several mistakes costing over 20 grand in repairs and buyouts for the customers :) Guess I was not doing so bad after all. A$$hole that he is he deserves it! |
Originally posted by Troutly For a minute there I thought Doc was trying to type a 1000 word post like me :rolleyes: :crazy: You still be the KING of the 1000 word post!!!!!!!!!!!:D :D |
I've posted this before, but it seems appropriate in this thread. As I understand it, this is an actual complaint letter sent to National Telephone (NTL) in England. Whether that is true or not, I don't know, but it is still a great read.
AFAIK, there are only two major telecom providers in England, NTL and British Telecom (BT). BT is renowned for absolutely piss-poor customer service, not to mention ****ty service in general, thus the rise of NTL (I suppose). In any case, I find this letter to be a sterling example of why the language is called "English" - it takes a Brit to come up with a masterpiece like this... Dear Cretins: I have been an NTL customer since 9th July 2001, when I signed up for your 3-in-one deal for cable TV, cable modem, and telephone. During this three-month period I have encountered inadequacy of service which I had not previously considered possible, as well as ignorance and stupidity of monolithic proportions. Please allow me to provide specific details, so that you can either pursue your professional prerogative, and seek to rectify these difficulties - or more likely (I suspect) so that you can have some entertaining reading material as you while away the working day smoking B&H and drinking vendor-coffee on the bog in your office. My initial installation was canceled without warning or notice, resulting in my spending an entire Saturday sitting on my fat arse waiting for your technician to arrive. When he did not arrive at all, I spent a further 57 minutes listening to your infuriating hold music, and the even more annoying Scottish robot woman telling me to look at your helpful website.... how? I alleviated the boredom to some small degree by playing with my testicles for a few minutes - an activity at which you are no doubt both familiar and highly adept. The rescheduled installation then took place some two weeks later, although the technician did forget to bring a number of vital tools-such as a drill bit, and his cerebrum. Two weeks later, my cable modem had still not arrived. After several further telephone calls (actually 15 telephone calls over 4 weeks) my modem arrived a total of six weeks after I had requested it, and begun to pay for it. I estimate that the downtime of your internet servers is roughly 35%...these are usually the hours between about 6pm and midnight, Monday to Friday, and most of the useful periods over the weekend. I am still waiting for my telephone connection. I have made 9 telephone calls on my mobile to your no-help line this week, and have been unhelpfully transferred to a variety of disinterested individuals, who are it seems also highly skilled bollock jugglers. I have been informed that a telephone line is available (and someone will call me back); that no telephone line is available (and someone will call me back); that I will be transferred to someone who knows whether or not a telephone line is available (and then been cut off); that I will be transferred to someone who knows whether or not a telephone line is available (and then been redirected to an answer machine informing me that your office is closed); that I will be transferred to someone who knows whether or not a telephone line is available (and then been redirected to the irritating Scottish robot woman...and several other variations on this theme. Doubtless you are no longer reading this letter, as you have at least a thousand other dissatisfied customers to ignore, and also another one of those crucially important testicle moments to attend to. Frankly I don't care, it's far more satisfying as a customer to voice my frustrations in print than to shout them at your unending hold music. Forgive me, therefore, if I continue. I thought BT were ****, that they had attained the holy piss-pot of god-awful customer relations, that no one, anywhere, ever, could be more disinterested, less helpful or more obstructive to delivering service to their customers. That's why I chose NTL, and because, well, there isn't anyone else is there? How surprised I therefore was, when I discovered to my considerable dissatisfaction and disappointment what a useless shower of bastards you truly are. You are sputum-filled pieces of distended rectum - incompetents of the highest order. British Telecom - wankers though they are - shine like brilliant beacons of success, in the filthy puss-filled mire of your seemingly limitless inadequacy. Suffice to say that I have now given up on my futile and foolhardy quest to receive any kind of service from you. I suggest that you do likewise, and cease any potential future attempts to extort payment from me for the services which you have so pointedly and catastrophically failed to deliver - any such activity will be greeted initially with hilarity and disbelief - although these feelings will quickly be replaced by derision, and even perhaps a small measure of bemused rage. I enclose two small deposits, selected with great care from my cats litter tray, as a statement of my utter and complete contempt for both you and your pointless company. I sincerely hope that they have not become desiccated during transit - they were satisfyingly moist at the time of posting, and I would feel considerable disappointment if you did not experience both their rich aroma and delicate texture. Consider them the very embodiment of my feelings towards NTL, and it's worthless employees. Have a nice day - may it be the last in your miserable short life, you irritatingly incompetent and infuriatingly unhelpful bunch of twats. Steven Langford MSc, Ph.D. |
my complaint about TOO OLD
He's already owned, and restored 3 boats I'd kill for ... :D
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Hey Mark ,
I have been waiting for this Link a long time! GOOD ONE. |
You got me Dock. I already had 2 bags of popcorn poped and was working on the 3rd.
Thanks for the link, I'm sure it will come in very handy. |
:D :D :D :D Thanks Dock! I am going to have some fun today.
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