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Funniest thing I have read in a LONG time!

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Old 09-25-2003, 09:19 PM
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Talking Funniest thing I have read in a LONG time!

Australian bricklayer report. This is a true story, published in the Australian equivalent of the Workers Comp board.

Dear Sir:

I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put "poor planning" as the cause of my accident, You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new 6-story building. When I completed my work, I found that I had some bricks left over, which when weighed later, were found to be slightly in excess of 500 lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the 6th floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded the bricks into it. Then, I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks.

You will note in Block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135 lbs. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the grouns so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceded at a rapid rate up the side of the building., In the vicinity of the 3rd floor, I met the barrel, which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collar bone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately, bythis time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope, in spite of beginning to experience pain., At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Now, devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 50 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you can imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the 3rd floor, I met the barrel coming up, This accounts for the 2 fractured ankles, broken tooth and seveeral lacerations of my legs and lower body.

Her my luck began to change slightly.. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately, onl7y 3 vertebrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unaable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope, and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. Tjhis explains the 2 broken legs.

I hope this answers your inquiry.

Kind Regards,

Mike (Last name omitted for obvious reasons)
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Old 09-25-2003, 09:29 PM
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I believe that this will be addressed in the next episode of "Myth Busters".
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Old 09-25-2003, 10:12 PM
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Old 09-25-2003, 11:03 PM
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Working in the masonry/construction industry, I have had that story on my office wall for about eight years now.
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Old 09-26-2003, 07:43 AM
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I caught myth busters last night, but this story was not on it.
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Old 09-26-2003, 08:11 AM
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I would be suprised if the rope could be untied with 550 lbs of tension on it. Ever tried to undo a dockline that is under tension?
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Old 09-26-2003, 08:17 AM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Budman
I would be suprised if the rope could be untied with 550 lbs of tension on it. Ever tried to undo a dockline that is under tension?
Details details!
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