What would you do ???
 

My wife just called to tell me our 15 yr old daughter was caught cheating on a math test.

I never win the battle when it comes to discipline. I am strict and she is not.

I never win:mad: :mad:

You left out ALL OF The ABOVE :D

Tell her how terribly, terribly disappointed you are in her, and then a few days of the silent treatment......

Consequences
 

Let her endure the consequences the school has for cheating (hopefully strong enought to make an impression). Then ground her for a week or so for violating your trust (if she cheats on tests, where else is she being less than honest). She can spend the week at home practicing extra math so she does not need to cheat. Better to get caught cheating at 15 and suffer the consequences than at 25.

You first have to sit down with her and find out EXACTLY WHAT SHE WAS DOING WHEN SHE GOT CAUGHT!!!!!! If you dont, how will you ever help her to not caught again!!!!!!!!

this works. treat her like an adult and ask her if she wants to graduate and grow up not as smart as everybody else because they took the time to actually learn the stuff and she didn't. but also mention when she gets out into the real world and she doesn't posses the skills it takes to make it, not to come running home looking for a hand out. but let her make up her own mind, if you raised her right she will make the right decision not to cheat again.

Talk to the teacher! As a former teacher, I really liked it when parents showed interest in their childs education. Many don't seem to give a crap, school is nothing more than a baby sitter for many parents. Let the teacher know you want to do something, perhaps she has some extra assignments you can sit and do with your daughter. And the cell phone and computer go first. Especially the cell phone!!! Maybe let her use the computer for school work, but no internet/emails.

But, talk to the teacher!!

Mike

waterbum nailed it!

I see too many parents these days running behind their kids cleaning up their messes. You have to let life teach them lessons when they are young and the consequences are not life-altering. Your daughter WILL thank you for it when she is old enough to appreciate what you are trying to do for HER.

P.C. ANSWER= long talk..................help her with her math (only if she doesnt understand it).

or do what most of our parents did . smack her around a little and put the fear of DAD in her.

Fred, did you get grounded from the horse??? Dude, that had to suck.

She is 15, she knows everything! Turn into a slave and pull the cell phone and computer!!

Easy Now.....You mean to tell me nobody here ever did anything wrong like cheating on a math test. How about progressive punishment. If this was the first time, have a talk with here and a mild punishment, with the understanding if it happens again the punishment will become more severe. If you blast the kid out of the water on the first mistake, whats left if it happens again? firing squad? Kids do stupid things, hell, adults do stupid things, make here aware her behavior will not be tollerated and there are consequences for your actions.

But we didn't get caught, that's the difference. :)
Give her a parent to kid talking too, then let it go. It's not that big a deal. We all did it, ..........and survived.

Just think about this, she can learn it now or you can pay for her to learn it in college.

OOhh, I thought you were talking about the wife! I guess I should have read before I voted.

Firm and DIPLOMATIC

A diplomat is a person that can tell you to GO TO HELL in such a way that they ACTUALLY LOOK FORWARD TO THE TRIP! BH

I think that maybe Too Old's father forbid him to "play" on water.

Take away some convenience items and the silent treatment, should work fine, after you tell her how upset you are.

Worked on my 3 sisters when I was growing up.

wax on, .......wax off,......

You're working on the wrong person! You and your wife have to get on the same page first. IF you ever agree on how to handle it, then talk to the kid. If not, forget it...

My dad always said the quickest way to your head is through your a$$. If something like cheating went on he would break out the belt. I'm am the only one of his kids that is worth a crap though. But my parents got divorced when I was in high school, so my younger siblings never got disciplined and now look at the losers. Everyone is different, it was hard to ground me because I spent all my extra time working with dad, how is he gonna ground me from that? I was forced to have A's in school in order to drive. I even rode the buss a few weeks of my senior year in high school. Since she doesn't drive, what is the most important thing in her life right now? And take that away from her until the cheating stops and the grades are adequate.

And if you do go talk to the teacher, which I recommend, do not defend your daughter. My mom defends my brother in every way to the teachers and it just makes her look like an idiot.

Ernie

Tell her how cheating is wrong ,ask her to try to live up to a higher standard, like ,, Bill & Hillary ?

First let me say, I don't have any kids. So wadda I know?

Hopefully she's not one those snotty kids with green hair and earings in her nose.

I'd ask why she didn't know the answer to the question. Give her a little support and show your on her side. Plus she's a little old to get put over your knee at 15.

Was she looking at someone else's paper or did she have a cheat sheet that she brought with her? Did she know everything else but was unsure about one answer? Get involved. Then offer to open the book with her and show an interest in seeing that she learns the material. You probably won't understand it but give it a try. She'll appreciate the effort even if it's only for an hour.

I'm a big believer in spankings, but I don't think this is one of these times. I don't think a spanking will make her study harder. I'd also ask her what she wants to become in life and then point out why her education will help her to achieve her goals and enjoy the rest of her life.

I should have a kid to see if this crap really works or not.

Talk to teacher first.Take the cell phone and house phone away, unplug the inernet from computer. After you know what the problem was with the test and which part that she needed the extra help on, sit down and help her with it, keep the items like a week and no friends as well. Being grounded not only grounds the daughter it grounds the arents as well. An dmake sure the better half also enforces these. Not to harsh its her first time to get caught, save the long talk for later just tell how dissapointed you are at here and cold shoulder her fo rthe time as well.

Here's the outcome:

No cell phone except during the weekdays so my wife can communicate with her.

No house phone in her room.

No internet/chat for 1 week

Grounded for 1 week

She was caught with the old answers written on your arm trick !!!

We talked about it with her and my wife is calling the teacher today . We reinforced the severity of this and also the need to set priorities and stick to them.

My daughter also stated that 40 people were in the room when she got caught and news of this spread like wildfire in the school since she is so popular. She also stands a chance at being let go from cheerleading and cannot be on the honor roll this year.


She recognizes the magnitude of her mistake, but we felt we needed to also tighten the belt at home as well, and used this event to do so.


Thanks everybody for the ideas and support. It helps to get an idea of what other parents go through !!!

Strange. I grew up without a cell phone.
15 and "neeeeeeds" a cell phone.???
I'd pull the cell phone anyway...

I've been through this with my own daughter, and I believe you handled it right.
It's a good sign she realized the severity of what she did and how it can and will affect her activities.

Good for you, good for her.

Good job on the way you handled things. To bad for her she might be off the cheer squad and honors though. May be this will help her think before she trys to do something like this again.

Hugetime cheated on spelling tests. Unfortunately, he copied off of Puder.:D

It wasnt all that long ago that I was 15 so I know that the cell phone and computer have to GO!!!!!!!

But my mother used to make me sit at the table in the kitchen with her and do homework in the subject that I was having trouble in (even if it was homework that SHE went through the book and picked out for me). So being 15 and having no other distractions other than my mother, whom I didn't want to talk to at 15. I was forced to get good at the subject. I graduated in the top 15% of my class so I guess it worked

There is only one way to insure that she will not get caught cheating again...Teach her to cheat correctly. Writing the answers on her arm is a product of bad parrenting. You should teach her to write them very small on a peice of paper that will roll up and fit inside her pen. Or, Make a song out of the contraband answers. This will give you something fun for the family to do at the dinner table. Maybe you can get one of her friends involved, so they only have to remember half as much, then they can switch tests halfway through. Pick her friend with low self estem and possibly a bad family. This will let you improve two lives, not just one.
Sorry, no more good advice tonight, gotta go teach a youth group!