Ten ways to tell if you are a performance boat nut

Every vehicle at your home has a trailer hitch including your kids tricycle

The blades on your ceiling fan have been repitched cupped and balanced

All your clothing comes from the Mercury racing catalog.

You are surprised to find out that Arizona also has a desert.

You have a black velvet painting of Elvis , John Wayne , Reggie Fountain , and Jesus playing cards.

Your wife want a nose job so you have her call IMCO

Every vacation you take is tangent to a poker run

Your boat payment is greater than your mortgage

Even your kids stroller has buddy bearings

When you take a good look around your house you can find about 34 life jackets


What else can you add to this list.......

your boat is faster than your car

you have cigarette racing team carved on the back of your head

You have eight boats, and two trucks.

those are good

You talk about the "twins" a lot, but you want quadruplets
You back down an exit ramp
Flushing an engine is more important than flushing the toilet
When entering onto the freeway, you cut off the guy in the main lane because you're on the starboard and you have the right away(remember, you're still in reverse)
You're always playing with your "sticks"
You don't think of Trim as a woman
You tie fenders off on your car/truck when you park
You installed a swim ladder on the back of your pickup
The flooring in your house is snap on carpet over non skid
On Fridays, it's you that drives your kids to school, you wife throttles
Something's always for sale
You had surge brakes installed on you kid's red wagon
You sleep in a hoist

And the number one reason........

You install running lights on your lawnmower.

AMEN

You keep a mock up of your dash in the garage for practice runs during the winter (making those rmmmmmmmmmm noises while grabbing the throttles. The serious ones will strap on the life jacket and hook up the kill switch lanyards.