Maria had just got married and, being a traditional Italian, she
was still a virgin. So, on her wedding night, staying at her mother's house, she was nervous. But her mother reassured her.

"Don't worry, Maria. Tony's a good man. Go upstairs and he'll take care of you."

So up she went. When she got upstairs, Tony took off his shirt and exposed his hairy chest. Maria ran downstairs to her mother and says, "Mama, Mama, Tony's got a big hairy chest."

"Don't worry, Maria," says the mother," all good men have hairy
chests. Go upstairs. He'll take good care of you."

So, up she went again. When she got up in the bedroom, Tony took off his pants exposing his hairy legs. Again, Maria ran downstairs to her mother. "Mama, Mama, Tony took off his pants and he's got hairy legs!"

"Don't worry. All good men have hairy legs. Tony's a good man. Go ustairs and he'll take good care of you." So up she went again.

When she got up there, Tony took off his socks and on his left
foot he was missing three toes. When Maria saw this, she ran
downstairs."Mama, Mama, Tony's got a foot and a half!"

"Stay here and stir the pasta."