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  1. #1
    Registered hot water's Avatar
    My Boats:
    2000 382 Formula Fastech
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    Feb 2002
    Northern California

    Talking Hump Day Humor (not the original)

    Offense intended for everyone!!!!!
    What's the best form of birth control after 50?
    > >
    Why do men want to marry virgins?
    They can't stand criticism.
    > >
    What's the difference between a new husband and a
    new dog? After a year,
    the dog is still excited to see you.
    > >
    What is the biggest problem for an atheist? No one
    to talk to during orgasm.

    What do you call a smart blonde?
    A golden retriever.

    Why does the bride always wear white?
    Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the
    stove and refrigerator.

    A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in sixth
    grade. Who has the
    biggest boobs?
    The blonde, because she's 18.

    Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
    Ask your mom.

    How do you know when you're really ugly? Dogs hump
    your leg with their
    eyes closed.

    How do you know when you're leading a sad life? When
    a nymphomaniac
    tells you, 'Lets just be friends.'

    Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
    Because they have
    cotton balls.

    What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws
    old ladies? A Bingo

    Why did God create alcohol?
    So ugly people could have sex too.

    What's the difference between Beer Nuts and Deer
    Nuts? Beer Nuts are $1,
    and Deer Nuts
    are always under a buck.

    What three two-letter words mean small?
    'Is It In?'

    Why does Mike Tyson cry during sex?
    Mace will do that to you.

    If you are having sex with two women and one more
    walks in, what do you have?
    Divorce proceedings most likely.

    What would you call it when an Italian has one arm
    shorter than the other?
    A speech impediment.

    What does it mean when the flag at the Post Office
    is flying at half mast?
    They're hiring.

    What do toilets, a clitoris, and an anniversary have
    in common? Men miss them all.

    Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
    Breasts don't have

    Why aren't there any Puerto Ricans on Star Trek?
    Because they're not going to work in the future either.

    Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi?
    He walks around saying 'Yo.'

    What do you call an Alabama farmer with a sheep
    under each arm? A Pimp.

    Why do drivers education classes in Redneck schools
    use the car only on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays?
    Because on Tuesday and Thursday, the Sex Ed class uses it.

    What's the Cuban National Anthem?
    Row row row your boat.

    What's the difference between a Northern fairytale
    and a Southern fairytale?
    A Northern fairytale begins 'Once upon a time.' A
    Southern fairytale begins ''Y'all ain't gonna believe this ****.'

  2. #2
    My Boats:
    88 IMP Eleganza
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  3. #3
    Platinum Member Platinum Member CigDaze's Avatar
    My Boats:
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    Jun 2001
    St. Petersburg, FL

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