This is a story about a couple who have been married for years.
The only friction in their marriage was the husband's habit of farting
loudly every morning when he awoke. The noise would wake his wife and the
smell would make her eyes water and make her gasp for air.
Every morning she would plead with him to stop ripping off because it was
making her sick.
He told her he couldn't stop it and that it was perfectly natural.
She told him to see a Doctor, she was concerned that one day he would blow
his guts out.
The years went by and he continued to rip them out!
Then one Thanksgiving morning as she was preparing the turkey for dinner
and he was upstairs sound asleep,
she looked at the bowl where she had put the turkey innards and neck,
gizzard, liver and all spare parts
and a malicious thought came to her. She took the bowl and went upstairs
where her husband was sound asleep
and gently pulling back the bed covers, she pulled back the elastic waist
band of his underpants and emptied the
bowl of turkey guts into his shorts.
Some time later she heard her husband awaken with his usual trumpeting which
was then followed by a blood
curdling scream and the sound of frantic footsteps as he ran to the
The wife could hardly control herself as she rolled on the floor laughing,
tears in her eyes!
After years of torture she reckoned she had got him back good.
About twenty minutes later, her husband came downstairs in his blood stained
underpants with a look of
horror on his face.
She bit her lip as she asked him what the matter was.
He said, "Honey, you were right. All these years you have warned me and I
wouldn't listen to you"
"What do you mean?" asked the wife.
"Well, you always told me that one day I would end up farting my guts out,
and today it finally happened.
But by the grace of God, some vaseline, and these two fingers, I think I got
most of them back in.