Like Tree0Likes

Thursday morning funnies

Reply
Old 01-24-2002, 07:46 AM
  #1
Registered
Thread Starter
 
nautigirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: GRAND RAPIDS, MI
My Boats: 1995 237 PQ Stryker
Posts: 380
Talking Thursday morning funnies

Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke, when it started to rain.

One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end, put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.

Lady 1: What's that?
Lady 2: A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Lady 1: Where did you get it?
Lady 2: You can get them at any drugstore.

The next day, Lady 1 hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms. The guy, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely she is, after all, over 80 years of age, but very delicately asks what brand she prefers.

Lady 1: Doesn't matter son, as long as it fits a Camel.

The pharmacist fainted.

Four men went golfing one day. While three of them headed for the first tee, the fourth went into the clubhouse to take care of the bill. The three men started talking and bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, "my son is a home builder, and he is so successful that he gave a friend a new home for free." The second man said, "my son was a car salesman, and now he owns a multi-line dealership. He’s so successful that he gave a friend a new Mercedes fully loaded for free." The third man not wanting to be outdone, bragged, "my son is a stockbroker, and he’s doing so well that he gave his friend an entire portfolio for free."
The fourth man, who was running late, joined them on the tee a few minutes later. The first man mentioned, "we were just talking about our sons. How is your son doing?" The fourth man replied, "well my son is gay and dances at a gay bar." The other three men grew silent as he continued. "I’m not totally thrilled about the dancing job, but he must be doing good. His last three boyfriends gave him a house, a brand new Mercedes fully loaded, and a stock portfolio."


nautigirl is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 08:24 AM
  #2
Member #9
Charter Member
 
hp500efi's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Pewaukee, WI
Posts: 4,269
Post

__________________
Member of the Liquid Jungle
hp500efi is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 09:15 AM
  #3
Registered
 
Milord's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Lake St. Clair, Canada
My Boats: 1986 Four Winns Liberator 241
Posts: 1,213
Post

Milord is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 09:21 AM
  #4
Charter Member #927
Charter Member
 
Payton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: IN
My Boats: 1991 34' Super Hawaii
Posts: 4,817
Post

Payton is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 09:27 AM
  #5
Registered
 
Shane's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Niskayuna, NY
My Boats: 2009 FORMULA 292
Posts: 5,543
Post

DOH!
Shane is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 09:29 AM
  #6
OSO Content Provider
Commercial Member
 
SHARKEY-IMAGES's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: Sharkey-Images.com
Posts: 19,672
Talking

__________________
www.TimSharkey.com/

Digital Photography & Video one BYTE at a time !
SHARKEY-IMAGES is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 10:04 AM
  #7
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
 
CigDaze's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: St. Petersburg, FL
My Boats: Cigarette 35 Cafe Racer
Posts: 21,346
Post

CigDaze is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 10:09 AM
  #8
Registered
 
Join Date: Jan 2002
Location: St. Louis, MO
My Boats: 2006 Cigarette Rough Rider - AMII
Posts: 263
Post

Scuba Steve is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 12:01 PM
  #9
Registered
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: Gainesville Fl.
My Boats: 93Avanti 27' 502
Posts: 573
Post

FloridianSon is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 01-24-2002, 12:25 PM
  #10
Registered
 
Risk Taker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2001
Location: New Hampshuu !!
Posts: 2,808
Post

Risk Taker is offline  
Reply With Quote
Reply

Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
frequentflyer
General Boating Discussion
0
07-22-2004 10:42 AM
Risk Taker
General Boating Discussion
0
04-02-2002 11:25 AM
CigDaze
General Boating Discussion
14
01-24-2002 01:48 PM
nautigirl
General Boating Discussion
13
01-18-2002 05:02 PM



Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:09 PM.


Copyright 2011 OffShoreOnly. All rights reserved.