Since my earlier joke did seem rather RUDE, I thought I'd go with something a little less RUDE......

A distraught young woman decides to throw herself into the ocean.

Down at the docks, a handsome young sailor notices her tears, takes pity on her, and says, "Hey, you’ve got a lot to live for. All you need is a new start. I’m off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I can stow you away on my ship. I’ll take good care of you and bring you food every day." Moving closer, he slips his arm around her shoulders and adds, "I’ll keep you happy, and you’ll keep me happy." She agrees, and the sailor brings her aboard that night and hides her in a lifeboat. Every night he brings her three sandwiches and a piece of fruit and they make passionate love until dawn. Three weeks later, during a routine search, she is discovered by the ship’s captain.

"What are you doing here?" the captain asks.

"I have an arrangement with one of the sailors," she explains. "He’s taking me to Europe, and he’s screwing me."

"He sure is, lady," says the captain. "This is the Staten Island ferry."

Oldie but still a goodie

Figures - you guys are always trying to trick us girls!!