Cigarette Launches New Model!!!
 

December 22, 2010 Miami, Fl

Cigarette Racing, the worlds leader in high-performance boating unveils a brand new addition to their lineup. (I can't believe Trulio missed the scoop on this one???).

Cigarettes new model, the IBS TG will be available in both the 38 side by side and 39 staggered engine configurations. The meaning behind the designation IBS and TG refers to "Irritable Bowel Syndrome" and "Turds Gone".

Said Cigarettes Skip Braver,

"In respone to the underwhelming cry by landlubbing pool boys for performance boat features typically found in a Ritz Carlton rest room, we undertook this serious challenge and have responded with a new design that not only addresses the concerns of those suffering with IBS, but does so without sacrificing performance! We have redesigned our electric drop down bolsters seats into an electric flush bolster using light weight kevlar for strength while actually reducing the weight of the bolster! We creatively used the same electric motor from the drop down bolster for the flush mechanism. And we also came up with a ingeniuos solution for those nasty holding tanks. We designed a direct discharge system, aka the TG "Turds Gone", with the discharge right behind the first hull step the system will discharge turds at speed and with the air and water action under the hull it literally disinegrates them. Thus there is no weight lost to the holding tank, piping or a macerator system, and no crappy odor. With Mercury Racing engines now utilizing closed cooling there is plenty of water volume and pressure available to serve the TG system and its bidet like "no wipe" feature. Additonally since we no longer need our logo'd porta potty in the cabin we have actually seen speeds increase up to .0001 MPH at top end!"

Well there you have it folks, another trend setting statement from Cigarette Racing. Just think you'll never have to worry about having enough Tucks Take Alongs in your pocket or purse again!

And I was just about to make an angry phone call to Skip at Cigarette.

Nice! :drink:

Lmao

LMAO! Poor Jup...

I saw that you sold yours. Is this what you plan to get next?:party-smiley-004:

Too late...already have my next Cig in hand...maybe the next one though... I'm getting old and will likely need that feature.

no more excuses for JS except money!!

What's in your other hand??????:party-smiley-004::evilb:

I could C Pete drive'n w/ his big azz seated on a stool!!:grinser010:

I think she said her name was Connie.

:lolhit::party-smiley-004:

Man, it's not hard to figure out what time of the year it is, boredom has set in....... bad.

Y havnt we seen pix?

Cigarette Humor ?
 

I'm probably one of most tactless and undiplomatic people on OSO as shown many times in the past.I,however would not stoop so low as to pick on one of the few successful HP boat builders left. I have no ax to grind and in fact I have been in some minor battles with SKIP at boat shows.

Gladiator

she's in Nebraska!! HaHa!!!!!!:lolhit:

and there i was all excited:lolhit:

This has nothing to do with picking on Skip, this is all directed at a forum member (JS) that was complaining about the lack of fine pooping facilities found on Cigs.

Tom you are a riot!! Too Funny!!!

So am I !!! :evilb::evilb::evilb:

Here ya go...

Bad Azz!

give me a city!!!!:bsflag:

My Tarnished Image !
 

I was just trying to be a good guy for a change,and my being in uncharted water for me,I misunderstood and it won't happen again.:evilb::evilb::evilb:

We're in sin city! Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha !!! :evilb::evilb::evilb:

Your in Vegas thinking of me and Cigarette toilets? :eek:

I just love the fact you got this rolling around in your head. I suspect you get a rise in blood pressure even clicking on OSO!
You must feel Ciggy got lost in the Nor-tech positive press stories that got posted this week......

Now if this was a real thread you could think about power bolsters, built in coolers (not strapped down igloos) and any number of features found on Nor-techs! :D

Its going to be a long winter for you "up north" guys.....work on the creativity!

That is a nice piece btw...enjoy it!

Not to be outdone, it looks like Nor-Tech is all over this one already...

They have certainly added a bit more luxury, and included the passengers as well.

http://forums.rennlist.com/rennforum...h-lux-copy.jpg

You are on a roll my friend! :drink:

Would you believe I innocently opened this thread thinking this was a real story?

:grinser010:

Damn it, Nortech out does Cigarette again! :D

Terry calls that the "day head with fresh air cooling!"

The point Tommy is missing (and the other Ciggy diehards) is the "lack of innovation" that Cig is known for. No power other than Mercury, no changes per owner request etc. They still think a "sh!tter box" in the center of the cabin looks good on a 500K boat! Igloo coolers from Walmart don't belong strapped to the cabin like a cub scout did it for his camping trip! I don't argue they don't have a head, they just don't make any attempt to make it look good. I can see in the Nor-tech threads when several Cig owners chime in with praise for new ideas that they indeed value the innovation so clearly it is something Cig should consider.

I understand the "shoot the messenger" idea and the track record of Cig owners leaving the brand for Nortech/OL shows that they indeed are looking for more than a logo on the side.

Tommy still hasn't found a single owner that went from a Nortech to a new Cig..............Why could that be? Hmmmm makes you wonder........

Bla, bla ,bla...give it up! I never asked who has gone from NT to Cig; I was not the one making the outrageous claims; track recoprd? How many did you find (3) LOL? Why don't you post that question in the Cig forum if you really care so much. BTW the 39 Cig has a built-in cooler.

I may B out there in about April!!!!!:coolcowboy:

.

Should we wait for ya? :kiss: I can tell your girl is out of town from all those xxx e-mails you've been sending. :eek:

BTW, I liked the one with the cars! :drink:

Never take a dump in a boat that does not have a fly brige.

You have to have rules in this world..... Or else as Dr. Venkmansaid "Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!"