Like Tree0Likes

Men Strike Back !!!

Reply
Old 02-15-2003, 09:11 AM
  #1
wayne
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Men Strike Back !!!

JUST SAW THIS , HAD TO POST IT

Men Strike Back !!
We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules from the male side. These are our rules ! Please note these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE !

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us griping about you leaving it down.

1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you. Live with it.

1. Saturday = sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Don't cut your hair. Ever. Long hair is always more attractive than short hair. One of the big reasons guys fear getting married is that married women always cut their hair.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints Do not work! Just say it!

1. We don't remember dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on a calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.

1. Most guys own three pairs of shoes - tops. What makes you think we'd be any good at choosing which pair, out of thirty, would look good with your dress?

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. Check your oil! Please.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. Let us ogle. We are going to look anyway; it's genetic.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.

1. We are not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-reading ability is not proof of how little we care about you.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. No, NO, you really DO have too many shoes.

1. It is neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.

1. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.

1. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape.

Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mind that. It's like camping


__________________
 
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 10:49 AM
  #2
Ginger or Mary Ann?
Charter Member
Trade Score: (1)
 
US1 Fountain's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Lafayette. IN
Posts: 10,866
Default


I really like #1 the best!
__________________
Some people are like Slinkies - Not really good for anything, but they
bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.
US1 Fountain is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 12:45 PM
  #3
Charter Member #1171
Charter Member
 
obnoxus's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: New Lenox , Il
My Boats: 2000 36 OUTLAW SOLD SHOPPING
Posts: 3,913
Default

Quote:
Originally posted by US1 Fountain

I really like #1 the best!
UM,,, there all # 1 !!!!!!!!!!
__________________
IF YOUR UNDER CONTROL,,,,,YOUR NOT GOING FAST ENOUGH !!!!
obnoxus is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 01:09 PM
  #4
RickerTX
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Exxxxceleent!
 
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 02:09 PM
  #5
Ginger or Mary Ann?
Charter Member
Trade Score: (1)
 
US1 Fountain's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Lafayette. IN
Posts: 10,866
Default

Quote:
Originally posted by obnoxus
UM,,, there all # 1 !!!!!!!!!!
__________________
Some people are like Slinkies - Not really good for anything, but they
bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs.
US1 Fountain is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 03:59 PM
  #6
Charter Member #232
Charter Member
 
Audiofn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2000
Location: Carlisle, MA USA
My Boats: 1979 Formula 302, 99 Formula 353, 81 Donzi 18 2+3 with 454
Posts: 18,379
Default

__________________
Put your best foot forward!
Audiofn is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 05:58 PM
  #7
Gone Fishin'
Charter Member
 
Waterfoul's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2000
Location: Grand Rapids/Holland/Grand Haven
My Boats: 1988 Tracker Pro 17, 40 hp Mariner.....1972 Glastron GT 140, Merc 50 power!!!
Posts: 7,408
Default

There goes Audiofn, posting like Troutly.
__________________
[b]M Go Blue.......Gator boots, gator luggage, gator purses... all at cut rate deals!!!!
Waterfoul is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 07:23 PM
  #8
AIRTIME
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
 
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 10:33 PM
  #9
Registered
 
little princess's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2002
Location: temecula
My Boats: Eliminator, 26 Daytona; 2001
Posts: 90
Default

Daaaaaam that makes me seem like a tom boy especially #1
little princess is offline  
Reply With Quote
Old 02-15-2003, 10:48 PM
  #10
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
 
Steve 1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Beautiful Fort Lauderdale www.cheetahcat.com
My Boats: Slippery when wet!
Posts: 10,833
Default

Steve 1 is offline  
Reply With Quote
Reply

Related Topics
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
Steamin Rice
Cigarette
4
07-24-2007 08:24 PM
LubeJobs42
General Boating Discussion
30
06-16-2006 02:10 PM
lucky strike
General Boating Discussion
46
11-25-2005 11:40 AM



Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On



All times are GMT -5. The time now is 06:49 PM.


Copyright 2011 OffShoreOnly. All rights reserved.