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What A Doll!!!

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Old 08-08-2003, 08:25 PM
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Talking What A Doll!!!

For the New Jersey Market:

1....Livingston Barbie-
This princess Barbie is only sold at the Short Hills Mall. She comes with Kenneth Cole 4-inch clunky shoes, an assortment of Kate Spade handbags and a Mercedes-Benz stretch limo. Options include tummy tuck, face lift and a workaholic Ken.

2...Newark Barbie-
This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a low-rider Chevrolet with oversized wheels and tinted windows.

3.. Hoboken Barbie-
This yuppie Barbie comes with choice of a BMW sports car or a souped up Hummer 2, which cruises until 2:00 am.

4.. Caldwell Barbie-
This trendy homemaker Barbie is
available with the Lexus SUV or Ford Windstar minivan, gets lost easily, and has no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell phone sold separately.

5... South Jersey Barbie-
This white-trash model comes in Wrangler jeans two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt, big hair, a six pack of Coors Light and a
Hank, Jr. CD set. She can spit over 5 feet and she can kick Ken's ass when she's drunk. A pickup is available with Confederate flag bumper stickers.

PLUS....

6.. Belmar - Seaside Barbie:
This gum-chewing, Trans-Am driving, Barbie still has not learned that you can't wear "white" pumps and walk on the boardwalk without your heel falling between the boards while you chase your Italian gold-chain wearing boyfriend. Her make-up is dark colored lip liner with lips covered in a sparkly nude color or no fill-in at all. Her ensemble
includes low-rise flared colored jeans with assorted colored G-strings that stick out the back of her jeans, a white barely-there see-through shirt. Her long, layered
hair is bleached/highlighted and BIG. Accessories include:
CD-player equipped with Bon Jovi and Springsteen CD's, Big can of Stiff Stuff Hair Spray, 9 prepaid tanning sessions, mirrored heart key-chain (won on the boardwalk) engraved with your Italian boyfriend's name.


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Old 08-08-2003, 08:42 PM
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You forgot to note that the Belmar - Seaside Barbie is actually from Staten Island.
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