OT:Old age

Old 08-27-2003, 02:20 PM
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Subject: Old age

Just heard that in America, the average cost for a Nursing Home is $188 per day!!!

Now, I figure it this way, I can get a real nice room at the Holiday Inn for around $65....that leaves $123 for beer, food (room service), laundry, Elvis collectibles, gratuities and clothes. They have a swimming pool, some even have a workout room (therapy), a lounge, cable (recreation) washer & dryer (if I am too impaired, a child or grandchild can pick up my clothes once a week, or they could rotate, that way everyone would only have to do it twice a year). Most have free toothpaste and razors, but all have free shampoo and soap.

There may be a bit of a wait to get that first floor room, but that's alright, it takes months to get into some Nursing Homes. There is the Senior bus, the Handicap bus, a Church bus or van, cabs, alert cabs, and in some cities The Duck! You have security and if someone sees you drop over, I am sure they would call an ambulance (if you break your hip, hopefully the family would be smart enough to sue). What more could you ask for?!

With AARP and other Senior discounts, I could be livin’ pretty darn nice.

So, when I reach that Golden age, help me keep my grin...just check my old rickety a** into the nearest Holiday Inn!
Old 08-27-2003, 04:11 PM
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Good One
I hope I remember this when the time comes.
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Old 08-27-2003, 04:54 PM
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My mom used to gripe at me for spending all my money saying, "When you die, they won't have the money to bury you with". I told her I didn't know anybody who died yet that didn't get buried!

Which leads me to my old saying:

What did the monkey say when he got his tail chopped off?
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Old 08-27-2003, 05:10 PM
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ah geez, I spend most of life now in hotel rooms, I sure dont want to retire in one. just find rich widow, hehe.

posted from Holiday Inn, Harrisonburg, VA.
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Old 08-27-2003, 05:30 PM
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Originally posted by catmando
It won't be long now!!!!!
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