Things people do on your boat that piss you off
11-26-2003, 03:58 PM
#31
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
What pisses me off is after a mechanic is done with your boat and there's grease all over the place, empty drive oil bottles in the boat, dirty rags in the bilge, and a handful of screws/bolts/washers in the cupholder(Hmmm...where did those come from?).
Smoking's fine, as I smoke, but you WILL stand or sit on the swim platform and the wind must be blowing from bow to stern; never while underway.
Don't bring bottles.
Don't pack like we're leaving for a week.
Don't throw **** all over the place, don't leave anything in the boat.
Don't spill anything and drink up before we get underway.
Hold on when I tell you to.
Don't bitsh when it's bumpy after I told you it may be a littke choppy today and if that's not possible then leave your cranky, prissy, whore of a wife home if she'll complain the whole way there and back.
Don't ask me to break out the porta potty unless you buy me a new one.
Don't try to help, I have my routine down perfectly and I can do it faster alone than with help.
Don't bother to give me 5/10/20 bucks for a day trip, it doesn't help any.
Don't stand if it's rough(unless in the front bolster).
Don't ask me to drive unless your boat is bigger and/or faster.
Don't expect to be in any hurry when I'm enjoying myself and am not ready to go home yet.
Don't tell me you're getting sick--it's a damned boat and yes they roll and rock, this is common knowledge.
Follow the rules and I'll never get pissed!
Smoking's fine, as I smoke, but you WILL stand or sit on the swim platform and the wind must be blowing from bow to stern; never while underway.
Don't bring bottles.
Don't pack like we're leaving for a week.
Don't throw **** all over the place, don't leave anything in the boat.
Don't spill anything and drink up before we get underway.
Hold on when I tell you to.
Don't bitsh when it's bumpy after I told you it may be a littke choppy today and if that's not possible then leave your cranky, prissy, whore of a wife home if she'll complain the whole way there and back.
Don't ask me to break out the porta potty unless you buy me a new one.
Don't try to help, I have my routine down perfectly and I can do it faster alone than with help.
Don't bother to give me 5/10/20 bucks for a day trip, it doesn't help any.
Don't stand if it's rough(unless in the front bolster).
Don't ask me to drive unless your boat is bigger and/or faster.
Don't expect to be in any hurry when I'm enjoying myself and am not ready to go home yet.
Don't tell me you're getting sick--it's a damned boat and yes they roll and rock, this is common knowledge.
Follow the rules and I'll never get pissed!
11-26-2003, 04:12 PM
#33
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Location: Boston, Ma
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JOE'S TOP TEN LIST
1) Stepping on the seat with shoes(i have actually had a chick try and step on my seat in high heals)
2) When people ask what to bring and you tell them beer and they show up with a 6 pack
3) when a chick walks in the cabin and starts re arranging things
4) Pissing over the side of the boat and getting it all over the side( I HAVE A DAMN SWIMPLATFORM IDIOT)
5) The $20 for gas and they act like a hero
6) When you pull into the dock and everyone stands there like there looking at a ghost
7) Frozen drinks(they never stay in the cup)
8) Trying to sit on the sun pad while going fast
9) Trying to carry on a serious converstion you while your going 70
10) When you get back to the dock and start to clean and everone all of a sudden has somewhere to be...
1) Stepping on the seat with shoes(i have actually had a chick try and step on my seat in high heals)
2) When people ask what to bring and you tell them beer and they show up with a 6 pack
3) when a chick walks in the cabin and starts re arranging things
4) Pissing over the side of the boat and getting it all over the side( I HAVE A DAMN SWIMPLATFORM IDIOT)
5) The $20 for gas and they act like a hero
6) When you pull into the dock and everyone stands there like there looking at a ghost
7) Frozen drinks(they never stay in the cup)
8) Trying to sit on the sun pad while going fast
9) Trying to carry on a serious converstion you while your going 70
10) When you get back to the dock and start to clean and everone all of a sudden has somewhere to be...
Last edited by impulsive; 11-26-2003 at 05:24 PM.
11-26-2003, 04:31 PM
#34
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Location: istanbul
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my boat has only two seats,usually i drive with my girlfriend and nothing goes wrong,smoking ,alcohol,food everything is alloowed idont mind
but there is only one thing actually happened once;
a friend ride, he was complaining about speedo, why this thing is not working? you did it on purpose?this boat is slower then i thought etc, by the way we were going high 5000rpms with 28's.that made me quite nervous.it was the first and last time i took him...
-it is not working because something on the water hit the stick of the speedo and its broken...
but there is only one thing actually happened once;
a friend ride, he was complaining about speedo, why this thing is not working? you did it on purpose?this boat is slower then i thought etc, by the way we were going high 5000rpms with 28's.that made me quite nervous.it was the first and last time i took him...
-it is not working because something on the water hit the stick of the speedo and its broken...
11-26-2003, 05:17 PM
#36
Platinum Member
Platinum Member
Everybody sending their diaper-wearing kids over to my boat cause it has the TV. I've had total strangers crawl over from several boats away and hand me a Barney tape to play for their toddlers in my cabin cause "so and so" told them I had a tv.
yes. I hate that. I usually catch them on the way TO my boat and stop the madness, but occasionally I'll be on a jetski or something and comeback to a cabin full of kids who MY KIDS don't know. Out they go, along with their trash.
yes. I hate that. I usually catch them on the way TO my boat and stop the madness, but occasionally I'll be on a jetski or something and comeback to a cabin full of kids who MY KIDS don't know. Out they go, along with their trash.
11-26-2003, 05:51 PM
#37
Toxic FORMULA
Platinum Member
Friends whose small kids climb out of the water over the swim platform and engine hatch , go thought the cockpit and into the cabin to go out the hatches and jump back in the water.
My velour seats in the cabin really hate that
My velour seats in the cabin really hate that
11-26-2003, 05:54 PM
#38
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SHOES!!
absolutely no shoes, unless you are an elderly person. I give the same respect to all boaters wether they care or not, if I board someone elses boat my shoes are off period end of story
bringing a their entire closet just for one night becase they think they are gonna get laid, and then throwing the **** everywhere
Almost got into a fist fight one day at PIB becase some drunk guys with boots on rafted off of me tromped right across my sunpad on the vinyl when I had towels laid out to cross on I asked them to politely cross on the towels next time and they got an attitude with me
I love the comparrisons of walking on furniture and cars
absolutely no shoes, unless you are an elderly person. I give the same respect to all boaters wether they care or not, if I board someone elses boat my shoes are off period end of story
bringing a their entire closet just for one night becase they think they are gonna get laid, and then throwing the **** everywhere
Almost got into a fist fight one day at PIB becase some drunk guys with boots on rafted off of me tromped right across my sunpad on the vinyl when I had towels laid out to cross on
I asked them to politely cross on the towels next time and they got an attitude with me I love the comparrisons of walking on furniture and cars
11-26-2003, 06:17 PM
#40
Geronimo36
Gold Member
If it's rough and the cabin door slides open, people think it's fine to try and close it!! Are you friggin nuts', let it break before you put yourself at risk!!
NO SMOKING, vinyl gets holes to fast, besides there is a 180 gallon gas tank below and an open vent on the side of the boat, and open vents that go into the engine room. NOT TO SMAAATTTT!
NO SMOKING, vinyl gets holes to fast, besides there is a 180 gallon gas tank below and an open vent on the side of the boat, and open vents that go into the engine room. NOT TO SMAAATTTT!
