I believe he's thinking possum, it's more common down south than ostritch, and does up nice on the barbecue. Going to use the formal name Opossum, A Hand Tanned Opossum Skin Interior has a high end ring to it.

Well I talked to Jerry Springer today, He read the whole tread and wants us all to come on the show. Pay's $300.00 a head but we have to promise to pull hair and spit on each other. I don't know about you but I could really use the $300.00. I don't have a whole lot of hair left and spit wipes right off.

I recieved an email from sick stinger last night. Apparently he's living in Nigeria and has a rich uncle in exile who needs a place to stash his millions....

He didn't sign the email as "sick stinger", but I'd recognize his grammar anywhere.

Now that is too funny...

I hope no one takes this little on-line tussle all that seriously...

It has been entertaining from where I'm sitting...

By the way, I now make sure I run my post through Word’s spell and grammar check before hitting the reply button…

The shipwrecked mariner had spent several years on a deserted island. Then one morning he was thrilled to see a ship offshore and a smaller vessel pulling out toward him.

When the boat grounded on the beach, the officer in charge handed the marooned sailor a copy of this V-fest thread and told him, "The captain said to read through this and let us know if you still want to be rescued."

The marooned sailor excitedly read thru the pages, pausing at times and just shaking his head in confusion. When he finished he turned to the officer in charge and said, "Well I would dearly love to get off this island, but I am quite confused, and somewhat apprehensive about returning to my home in America."

Why is that asked the officer in charge?

"Well," replied the marooned sailor, "When I left english was the primary language spoken, now it would appear that is no longer the case, and I fear I will never be able to grasp the meaning of this new language."

"Not to worry" stated the officer in charge, "We find if you read it backwards it sometimes makes more sense."

The marooned sailor decided to read The V-fest thread backwards before making up his mind and asked officer in charge, "Would you hold the ship for just a little longer?" After reading the thread backwards the marooned sailor eye's were glazed over with a red tint then screaming "GOD OF THUNDER HERE MY CRY", butt naked of coarse, found himself, he knew not how, swept up on the shore of different island. There was nothing else anywhere to be seen. No ship, no officer in charge, no supplies, no V-fest thread, nothing. The man looked around.

For the next four months he ate bananas, drank coconut juice and mostly looked to the sea for the ship to come to his rescue again. One day, as he was lying on the beach stroking his beard and looking for the ship, he spotted movement out of the corner of his eye. Could it be true, was it a ship? No, from around the corner of the island came a rowboat painted in "Rainbow Colors". In it was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen. She was tall, tanned, and her blonde hair flowed in the sea breeze.

He watched as she rowed her boat toward him.
As she arrived at the beach, he asked, "Where did you come from, how did you get here"?

She said, "I rowed from the other side of the island.. I landed on this island when my cruise ship sank"

"Amazing," he said, "I got here by reading the V-fest thread backwards"

"It is only me," she said. "Would you like to row over to my place?"

They both got into the rowboat and left for her side of island.

The woman easily rowed them around to a wharf that led to the approach to her place. She tied up the rowboat with a beautifully woven hemp rope. They walked up a stone walk and around a Palm tree, and there stood an exquisite bungalow painted in blue and white. "It's not much," she said, "but I call it home. Have a seat. Would you like a drink?"

"No," said the man, "one more coconut juice and I will puke."

"It won't be coconut juice," the woman replied, "I have a still. How about a Pina Colada?

Trying to hide his continued amazement, the man accepted, and they sat down on her couch to talk.

"You look great," said the woman, "I think I will go up and slip into something more comfortable."

After a short time, the woman returned wearing fig leaves strategically positioned and smelling faintly of gardenia.

"Tell me," she purred, "we have both been out here for a very long time with no companionship. You know what I mean. Have you been lonely? Is there anything that you really miss?" She moved closer to him. "Something that all men and woman need? Something that it would be really nice to have right now?"

"Yes there is, now that you mention it," the man replied, moving closer to her. "Tell me, do you happen to have an Internet connection? I need to thank those guy's on OSO"

hmmmmmmmmmmmmm what was this thread about

I am impressed if you read it! I just hope you didn't read any of it backwards!!

What is going on for Lake Norman?

All I want to know is if I am still an @$$hole? Because if we weren't friends I just don't think I could bare it.