Stupid boat tricks

Old 03-25-2002, 09:47 PM
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NEVER drive your boat where birds are walking.

Bucky ~ Your signature line above reminds me of a story that could have ended tragically.

I was running my little outboard tunnel race boat south of Laughlin NV about 10 miles. It was a fairly unused section of the Colo. River, and perfect day to do some prop testing.

The River level is known to change frequently, but I figured if I stayed close to the center I'd be ok.

I had made about 5 passes, But on the 6th pass, I decided to head upstream a little farther. Running at about 70mph, I saw about 20 ducks floating to my left up ahead, so I started to turn away, toward the right closer to shore, to avoid them.

Suddenly, as I was only about 50 feet from the birds, I noticed their undersides were about 1 inch from the water!!! The damn birds were STANDING UP! At that same instant the color of the water went from deep green to boat scum yellow - and was only INCHES deep.

I stayed in the throttle and took a deep breath.......said a prayer as I puckered waiting for the jolt.............................................. .................................................. ...........................................and then the water changed back to green.

I came back to the ramp immediately and called it a day

Last edited by BK; 03-25-2002 at 09:50 PM.
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Old 03-25-2002, 09:47 PM
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"Low Tide" that's what did it. Last year while launching, a guy with a old 27ft cruiser was launching with hi brand new black GMC grew cab dually. I came back from parking our trailer and the wife asked if I could help this guy. He was standing there perplexed because he luanched his boat and couldn't get the trailer out. When I saw how far he had backed in I told him he was probably off the ramp apron and dropped the wheels into the soft mud. I suggested he and his friends try to lift the empty trailer or jack it. Of course he said with this new rig he could just muscle it out with the truck. Well after ramming the trailer, smoking about half the tread off the tires he finally backed up to the bed of the truck and rammed it home. The result was a trailer that now had a trapezoid shape and went sidewas up the ramp. He parked it and went out on his boat!
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Old 03-25-2002, 10:09 PM
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I have had boats sink on me, catch on fire, steering break, trailer tires fall off, trailer breaks fall off, motors blow up, trim tabs move on their own, nose cones fall off.......... You all having a good laugh at me!!!!!!
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Old 03-25-2002, 10:35 PM
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I'm pulling my boat up the Parkway and this old station wagon goes flying by at almost 70 pulling a 24' Grady White. A boat way to big for that old car. Just as it passes the trailer starts to sway and I start slowing down. To the left, to the right and then to the left again into the concrete divider. He was in the left lane.

As the boat hits the divider a huge spray goes into the air. The car trailer and boat are now all connected but a bit twisted. the boat is across the road, the trailer is on the shoulder and the car is in the grass.

So I pull over just past the boat on the right shoulder and watch these three drunk guys come staggering out of the car. Remember the spray? Well the boat wasn't damaged much. That spray was a garbage can full or water and Blue Fish that are now laying all over the road. There must have been twenty fish and all these guys could do was to pick them up and wait for the cops to come to thier aid.

I left when the cops pulled up, the traffic was stopped for a while, I suppose.
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Old 03-26-2002, 03:20 AM
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This looks like a good trick...
Attached Thumbnails Stupid boat tricks-5outboards1boat.jpg  

Digital Photography & Video one BYTE at a time !
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Old 03-26-2002, 07:27 AM
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Back when I was a freshman in high school my best friend had a 12 ft plywood boat, closed bow that seated two people. This thing was real light, the two of us had no trouble carrying it from his garage to the lagoon out back.
I asked what motor he was going to put on it as he had several in the garage. He relpied that he thought it would hold the 40 horse and proceeded to pull it out. We managed to get it mounted and it didn't sink so we figured it was ok.
I jump in my boat while he gets his fired up, off we go.
It was early in the evening.
We get out on the bay and I'm running wide open (30 mph +/-) and my buddy is running alongside. I ask if he's wide open and shakes his head no, slams the throttle down and the boat practically leaps out of the water. A second later he's three lengths out in front of me.
Man, he's flying!!
Just about then his boat starts to porpoise real bad.
On the fourth oscillation it leaps completely out of the water and comes down bow first and slightly on the port side.
The bow digs in and over she goes, flipping end over at about 40 mph and my buddy get tossed out over the bow.
I cut the wheel to starboard trying to avoid the crash and also so I don't run him over. Circling around to port, all I see is what's left of the bow sticking straight up out of the water. My buddy's nowhere in sight. I just get mine stopped and he comes to the surface covered in mud.
When he got tossed out he dove to the bottom trying to get away from the boat.
I ask if he's ok, he is thankfully. He's swims around to check out the damage and finds the motor is still attached.
We tow it home, pull it up to the bulkhead (seawall) where it's shallow and find the 6 gal fuel tank is still attached too. Strong hose.
By now it's dark out.
Just about then his Dad comes over and, not seeing the other boat, asks "where is it?.
We proceede to tell him the story and his Dad starts laughing his ass off.
That boat never did get fixed. We wound up turning it into firewood.
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Old 03-26-2002, 09:21 AM
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Three years ago we went for a duck ride (you know the military ones) in Hot Springs Ark. A month after our ride one of the ducks sank. Tragically, a bunch of people died.

Two years ago we went for a duck ride for the company's summer event. A week later the boat sank.

Last year while on Lake Michigan our own boat sank.

So, who's giving us a ride this year?
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Old 03-26-2002, 09:27 AM
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Default Come on down Cord

Right now I'm thinking my best bet would be the insurance money

Time to break out the life vest

Old 03-26-2002, 09:38 AM
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Default I zoom home after work on a 90 degree day to get in some boating..

When I get to the ramp there is OLD station wagon parked in the middle of the ramp and an even older man getting ready to put his ROW-BOAT on top of it... I got the kid next door with me and one of his 18 year old friends, we walk down to the ramp and ask if he needs any help, to which he replies,,, no thanks,,,, I got it... well by the time he pulls it out of the water, flips it over and musters up enough energy to give it a lift onto the roof rack, it must have been fifteen minutes,,,, he struggles with it, gets the bow onto the rear of the car and ME BEING VERY IMPATIENT asks " are you sure you dont need a hand ",,,,,, Listen SONNY, I've been doing this by myself for 20 years,,,, I don't need no help from a young PUNK like yourself,,,, to which we wait about fifteen more minutes while he gets it on the roof, takes out his 50 foot of rope and proceeds to lash it down,,,,,,, waited over a half hour for a row-boat to get loaded......
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Old 03-26-2002, 09:46 AM
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Do you remember the pictures of the Tug boat that got too close to the bridge and was sucked under, only to tip back right side up afterward, engines still running??

Well, here is the text that goes along with those photos:

It was at the old Rooster Bridge at Demopolis, Ala. -- April 28, 1979 The CAHABA, Capt. Jimmy Wilkerson, was dropping 2 of his 4 barges thru the East span of Rooster Bridge -- around mile 200 on the lower Tenn-Tom -- with intent of running around thru the lift span and catching them below.

Pilot Earl Barnhart was on the tow helping the 2 deckhands take off safety wires, winch wires, etc. Wilkerson underestimated current, and got too close to the bridge. They had taken loose all rigging except the stbd. winch wire, which had somehow fouled. This wire pulled the stbd. tow knee under the bridge, and when it broke, the towknee popped up and hung in the bridge steel.

Now he's stuck, and the current laid the CAHABA onto the bridge, stbd. side too.

When the lower port deck went awash, the vessel rolled, went through the span, and came partially back up once it cleared. Capt. Wilkerson remained at the sticks; the port front pilot house window blew out, filling the place with water.

The boat with the blue trim you see is the CATHY PARKER; she was waiting above for her turn. The CATHY radioed to the TALLAPOOSA, who was down the reach below Blacks Bluff, that something had happened to the CAHABA. Capt. Gary Grammer tied off the TALLAPOOSA's tow, and light-boated to the CAHABA, where he pushed her out into a flooded corn field. The stbd. main engine of the CAHABA was still running. The TALLAPOOSA then rescued the 3 crew members, and secured the 2 loose CAHABA barges.

The photographer was from the Linden, AL DEMOCRAT, en route to Meridian, MS, and happened to get caught as the CAHABA blew for a draw at the Rooster bridge. It's believed that what kept these pictures out of circulation for so long was that the President of Warrior & Gulf, owners of the CAHABA, bought the negatives immediately after they were published in the LINDEN DEMOCRAT.

What righted the vessel? She had just topped off with fuel at Demopolis, 14 miles upstream. The CAHABA has one central fuel tank fwd. of the engines.

Had that tank been 1/2 full, she might have never come back up.
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