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How do you deal with someones death??

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Old 11-26-2002, 04:21 PM
  #21
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Tommy,

I saw you at the Alum Creek shootout a few weeks back, but didn't get the chance to say hi.

Very sorry to hear about the loss. As others have mentioned, time will heal the pain. Just keep the good times alive. I am sure you will have your friend around forever!
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Old 11-26-2002, 04:24 PM
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Aqua Holic, You have a white 21ish baja right? I think I saw you. What part of delaware are you in? my mom works there (visiting nurse) and i used to work at Buns Restaurant till it burnt down.
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Old 11-27-2002, 12:35 AM
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Man, some real sadness to some of your stories. If a lesson can be learned here, WEAR YOUR SEATBELT!! Troutly I'm sure will tell you how many of the deceased would have walked away if they were strapped in.

Hyper, you are pretty young, I bet this is all pretty hard to absorb. I lost a buddy at your age to a car wreck. Seems like many things are happening at once. I remember seing older , bigger, rolemodel type kids crying like babies, that's when I knew it was okay to show emmotion and that life was serious business. I have been thru this a few times as well as many others here have. Don't try to over analyze it, don't play the "what if" game and feel free to let your emmotions run free. YOu'll feel better. If you need to sneak off into the corner to do so, that is perfeectly okay. I remember what a minister said to me about 5 hours after a good freind decided to walk 2 doors down from his house where we were partying and put a 12 guage in his left eye and pull the trigger. Any time I think about it, now 7 years later, I still hear the gun shot. I disticntly remember every detail for hours. We searched the neighborhood until dawn, never found him......a blessing. I was with his brother running thru backyards all night, both of them were lifelong freinds of mine. We grew up together. We called the cops, they found him. His head was basically gone. The minister told me not to be afraid of anything I was feeling, it was all normal. The anger, the sadness, the rage, the guilt, the loneliness, the emmotion. Just let it fly. You may be stuck in the mud for a while, but you will get out when you are good and ready. Don't be afraid, be courageous, be ready to help others thru this, let others help you, that will help. Be with freinds, have fun, and look forward to tomorrow, because the sun is going to rise and you will have a decision to make. Enjoy life man, your buddy would want that, just as everyone else around you does. Keep your chin up, sorry to hear this, unfortunately life is not always peachy. Infact, sometimes it is pretty damn hard.

Take er slllllooowwwwwww. A4
 
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Old 11-27-2002, 06:21 PM
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I went to the crash site today. It was a pretty tight turn, I could see 60mph pushing it. There was a cross with candles and flowers by the tree that split the car in half. You could tell he tried to slow down before the turn a little, but it wasnt enough. There was tire marks through the dirt on the side of the road up to the tree. I found two pieces of the car, a 2" long piece of the car, probably went somewhere around the headlights or tail lights, and then a 3/4 inch long by 1/2 inch wide yellow plastic piece from a side marker. Im going to put them on a keychain to remember. The funeral is on Saturday, and on Sunday night from 6 to 7, I am planning on having his friends meet up there for the 1 week aniversary.

Thanks for the support.

Tommy
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Old 11-27-2002, 06:24 PM
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I forgot, I drove there, but was really shaky, white nuckeled doing 35mph down a 55mph road. Tuesday before this happened, It rained, and of course the traction control was off and I was sliding all over. But after going to the crash site, I couldnt drive back. I was to scared to. It was hard enough just sitting in the passenger chair. I noticed that putting on my seatbelt has become something I dont even notice I do. It is just on.
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Old 11-27-2002, 06:34 PM
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One day your new habits may save your life and Donnie will not have died in vain.
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Old 11-27-2002, 06:43 PM
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I lost 2 people that were involved in my life this month, my wife's Grandmother, and DanL my friend and boss. Then I put my basset Harley down the day before going to DanL's wake and funeral.

All I can say is remember the good times, and all the positive thing's that you where involved with, to better each other's live's.

I'm sorry for your loss.

Doug
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