The B.S. Thread
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New Years bash will be held at the Stultz Ranch again this year. There will be fire, mud, alcohol, atvs, guns, dogs, and fireworks. That's all the ingredients for America's
Funniest Home Videos and "you might be a redneck if....." You can pass out at the house or in the pond, it's up to you.
Funniest Home Videos and "you might be a redneck if....." You can pass out at the house or in the pond, it's up to you.
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It is near the Christmas break of the school year. The students have turned in all their work and there is really nothing more to do. All the children are restless and the teacher decides to have an early dismissal.
Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly, can leave early today."
Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question first."
Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."
Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."
Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.
Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."
Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."
Johnny is even madder than before.
Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."
Teacher: "That's right Nancy. You may also leave."
Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions. When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these *****es would keep their mouths shut!"
The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"
Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"
Teacher: "Whoever answers the questions I ask, first and correctly, can leave early today."
Little Johnny says to himself "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question first."
Teacher: "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Susie says, "Abraham Lincoln."
Teacher: "That's right Susie, you can go home."
Johnny is mad that Susie answered the question first.
Teacher: "Who said 'I Have a Dream'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Mary says, "Martin Luther King."
Teacher: "That's right Mary, you can go."
Johnny is even madder than before.
Teacher: "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for you'?"
Before Johnny can open his mouth, Nancy says, "John F. Kennedy."
Teacher: "That's right Nancy. You may also leave."
Johnny is boiling mad that he has not been able to answer to any of the questions. When the teacher turns her back Johnny says, "I wish these *****es would keep their mouths shut!"
The teacher turns around: "NOW WHO SAID THAT?"
Johnny: "TIGER WOODS. CAN I GO NOW?"
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Happy belated B Day Joew. Since I said it yesterday in person, I am sure you will let me slide. I have been busy all day monkeying with the Santa Boat. ![Boat](/forums/images/smilies/boat.gif)
I saw it on the trailer at the house, and I thought to myself. How cool would it be if I just posponed delivery for another couple weeks, got the yard arms from Boat Man and stuck this thing in my yard with a giant inflatable santa, and the rest of the christmas lights??????
Then I thought...... Nope. Not gonna do it.
She is sounding healthy though. It was getting pretty late for an initial run today, so I am going to try for the morning. Weather is supposed to be awesome Fri, so we should be able to shake her out Friday.
![Boat](/forums/images/smilies/boat.gif)
I saw it on the trailer at the house, and I thought to myself. How cool would it be if I just posponed delivery for another couple weeks, got the yard arms from Boat Man and stuck this thing in my yard with a giant inflatable santa, and the rest of the christmas lights??????
Then I thought...... Nope. Not gonna do it.
She is sounding healthy though. It was getting pretty late for an initial run today, so I am going to try for the morning. Weather is supposed to be awesome Fri, so we should be able to shake her out Friday.