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little billy adult joke!

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Old 04-10-2002, 02:56 PM
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Default little billy adult joke!

LITTLE BILLY ON ...GETTING OLDER
Little BILLY was sitting on a park bench munching
on one candy bar
after another.

After the 6th one, a man on the bench across from
him said, "Son,
you know eating all that candy isn't good for
you. It will give
you acne, rot your teeth, and make you fat."

Little BILLY replied, "My grandfather lived to be
107 years old."

"Oh?" replied the man. " Did your grandfather eat
6 candy bars at a
time?"

"No" replied Little Billy, "he minded his own
f@#$ing business!!"


LITTLE BILLY ON...PHILOSOPHY

A teacher asks her class, "If there are 5 birds
sitting on a fence
and you shoot one of them, how many will be
left?"
She calls on little BILLY.

He replies, "None, they will all fly away with the
first gunshot."

The teacher replies, "The correct answer is 4, but
I like your
thinking."
Then little BILLY says, "I have a question for
YOU. There are 3
women sitting on a bench having ice cream: One is
delicately licking the
sides of the triple scoop of ice cream. The second
is gobbling down
the top and sucking the cone. The third is biting
off the top of
the ice cream. Which one is married?"

The teacher, blushing a great deal, replies,
"Well, I suppose the
one that's gobbled down the top and sucked the
cone."

To which Little BILLY replied, "The correct answer
is 'the one with
the wedding ring on', but I like your thinking."

************************************************** ********************

LITTLE BILLY ON... MATH:

Little BILLY returns home from school and says he
got an F in
arithmetic.

"Why?" asks the father."

"The teacher asked, 'How much is 2x3?' I said 6,"
replied BILLY.

"But that's right!" says his dad.

"Yeah, but then she asked me, 'How much is 3x2?'"

"What's the f@#$%ing difference? " asks the father.

"That's what I said!"

************************************************** ********************

LITTLE BILLY ON...ENGLISH:

Little BILLY goes to school, and the teacher says,
"Today we are
going to learn multi-syllable words, class. Does
anybody have an example
of a multi-syllable word?"
BILLY says " Mas-tur-bate."

Miss Rogers smiles and says, "Wow, little BILLY,
that's a
mouthful.">

Little BILLY says, "No, Miss Rogers, you're
thinking of a blowjob."
>************************************************* *********************



LITTLE BILLY ON...GRAMMAR:
One day, during lessons on proper grammar, the
teacher asked for a
show hands from those who could use the word
"beautiful" in the
same sentence twice.

First she called on little Suzie, who responded
with, "My father
bought my mother a beautiful dress and she looked
beautiful in it."

"Very good, Suzie," replied the teacher. She then
called on little
Michael.

"My mommy planned a beautiful banquet and it
turned out
beautifully."

The teacher responded, "Excellent, Michael!" Then,
she reluctantly
called on little BILLY.

"Last night, at the dinner table, my sister told
my father that she
was pregnant, and he said "Beautiful, just f@#$%ing
beautiful!"


Mattyboy
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Old 04-10-2002, 03:15 PM
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Good Stuff !!! I hadn't heard the first and last one before.......
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Old 04-10-2002, 03:21 PM
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That little bastard!!!
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Old 04-10-2002, 03:32 PM
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Talking

I HAVE ONE!!!!

LITTLE BAD BOY BILLY IS IN SCHOOL ONE DAY AND THE EXERCISE IS TO USE THE WORD OF THE DAY IN A SENTENCE. THE TEACHER STATES THE WORD OF THE DAY IS INDEFINENTLY AND ASKED WHO CAN USE THIS IN A SENTENCE.

BILLY STICKS HIS HAND UP BUT FEARING WHAT HE MAY SAY THE TEACHER CALLS ON LITTLE SUZY. SHE SAYS, "DUE TO RAIN THE BASEBALL GAME WAS POSTPONED INDEFINENTLY." "VERY GOOD." THE TEACHER REPLIES.

SHE GOES THROUGH THE ENTIRE CLASS EACH TIME WITH LITTLE BILLY STRAINING WITH HIS HAND WAVING IN THE AIR.

FINALLY SHE DECIDES THERE IS REALLY NOTHING THAT BAD HE COULD SAY WITH INDEFINENTLY SO SHE CALLS ON HIM.

LITTLE BILLY STANDS UP, CLEARS HIS THROAT, LOOKS THE TEACHER IN THE EYE AND SAYS, "WHEN MY BALLS WERE SMACKING AGAINST HER ASS, I KNEW I WAS IN-DEFINENTLY."
 
Old 04-10-2002, 03:56 PM
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LMFAO at that last one!
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Old 04-10-2002, 05:57 PM
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Did you know little Billy had a paper route?
One day he was out collecting, and he goes to this house and says to the woman of the house "That will be $5.00 lady" to which she replies "I don't have any money, but I can pay you in sexual favors" Billy thinks about this for a minuet and says OK. He comes in, drops his pants and reveals a 14 inch penis, then proceedes to slide big washers over the end of it. The exited woman says "Don't worry, I can take it all", to which Billy replies "Not for five bucks you can"t!"
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