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(OT)Divorce input please..

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Old 04-12-2003, 06:14 PM
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OSOsweet
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Unhappy (OT)Divorce input please..

I have been reading this board anon for years, I feel as if I know most of you personally, I guess were all kind of brothers in a way. I feel very bad that my first post isn't about a new boat or such but something more negative, divorce. I have seen a few go down here on the board, and I like to take my advice from more successful people. The general population of this board is far above the normal in every aspect.

She had a 6 month affair with someone at her work, she eventually buckled under guilt when I asked her if she has always been true and spilled her guts. Nice 10th aniv surprise. But I don't think I'm going to be able to let it go.

I have broken her down enough that I she is willing to let me walk with my business and house. And I have no problem with child support even in a 50/50 deal, I may help her buy a condo but I'm not playing that card up front. It's seems like a good deal as far as divorces go and it may not be an opportunity available to me in the future. Consulting a lawyer this week, but I would like any input on covering myself from future problems other than the child support. Can she come back at a point in the future for alimony. I guess my ultimate question too is how do I make the deal we strike now stick? Thanks.

-Bill

PS: California
 
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Old 04-12-2003, 06:21 PM
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Sorry to hear that...I'm young and no where near the time to get married but my folks split up and I lived with my dad. Take what you can and stay on good terms with her for your kids sake. It pays off big time in the future, as long as she is willing to stay on good terms too. How hold are your kids? I'd definetely leave with your business, don't let her get that.
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Old 04-12-2003, 06:43 PM
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My wife filed on me last monday.................crushed me. I am going to try to keep it freindly........we'll see. I sure don't have any advice, but will keep an eye on this thread for some. Good luck.
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Old 04-12-2003, 06:46 PM
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We are both pretty cool and level headed. Well I'm not that old either (31)... We are and hopefully will be on good terms, it's just not going to work out. My kids are 9 and 7. Thanks for your input..

-B
 
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Old 04-12-2003, 06:48 PM
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We are actually going to try and use one bloodsucker (attorney) and see if that will work.............I want to stay freinds and actually I would like to see her change her mind.............we'll see what time has in store I guess.
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Old 04-12-2003, 06:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by tanned fat looks better
My wife filed on me last monday.................crushed me. I am going to try to keep it freindly........we'll see. I sure don't have any advice, but will keep an eye on this thread for some. Good luck.
Bryan

Ouch... I hope it goes as well as it can. I think it pays off to keep it civil from a money and healing standpoint. As long as she doesn't start taking advice from some angry penis hating lez. Good luck.
 
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Old 04-12-2003, 06:54 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by tanned fat looks better
We are actually going to try and use one bloodsucker (attorney) and see if that will work.............I want to stay freinds and actually I would like to see her change her mind.............we'll see what time has in store I guess.
Have you hit counseling yet? It helps solve some questions and appeals to their emotional side, errr, only side. You will learn something that could make the next one better. It's a good stall tactic to hide assets as well.
 
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Old 04-12-2003, 08:31 PM
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Sorry to here about it, for yor two mine is almost finnished (the 90 day wait). It goes without saying that keeping it peacefull is a plus, even when it is hard to do. In WA onece she sines the legal papers there are 3 sets then you are 90% out of the wood. She could decide to not sign the papres at the cort house with the judge but it looks real bad on her part. If it says you get the bizz and house and she gets X then after the cout house papers are sined that is what she gets no do over, In WA Rag's It is a loney club we are now in but it will get better.
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Old 04-12-2003, 10:32 PM
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Dang sorry to hear that.... I am 27 and was engaged, never married before... But did not go through, found out she cheated on me.... I am thinking that staying single is the way to go... People ask why I am leary of getting married. THIS is why....
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Old 04-12-2003, 10:44 PM
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If you use one lawyer make sure you are the one that does the hiring. He will then represent you. The agreement you have now will probably change soon when she gets gready. I had an agreement with my X that was fair to both- it was a 50/50 split. After she talked to her parents it all changed and got NASTY.
GOOD LUCK
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