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OT: Limericks Anyone?

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Old 07-01-2002, 04:47 PM
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Default OT: Limericks Anyone?

I'm sure most of us have heard a few good limericks in our days, so let's hear them. Be mindful that this a PG-13 rated board, so use your best judgement when writing about that fortunate man from Nantucket.

I'll start out with this one. Not quite sure it's a limerick, but I remember my older brothers teaching me this one many years ago.

One bright day, in the middle of the night
Two dead boys got up to fight
Back to back they faced each other
Drew their swords, and shot each other
The deaf policeman heard the noise
and came and shot these two dead boys
If you don't believe this lie is true
Ask the blindman, HE SAW IT TOO!!!


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Old 07-01-2002, 04:54 PM
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There was a young man from Brighton
Who thought he'd at last found a tight 'un.
He said, "Oh my love,
It fits like a glove."
Said she, "But you're not in the right 'un."

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Old 07-01-2002, 04:59 PM
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Old 07-01-2002, 05:09 PM
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Laveyman,

WOW that brought back MEMORIES! My father used to tell me that one! Thanks for the trip down memory lane!
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Old 07-01-2002, 05:11 PM
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A winded young lass named Voghill,
Sat down to rest on a molehill.
The resident mole,
Stuck his nose in her hole.
Miss Voghill's okay, but the moles's ill.
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Old 07-01-2002, 05:19 PM
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The sea captain's tender young bride
Fell into the bay at low tide,
You could tell by her squeals,
That some of the eels,
Had discovered a dark place to hide
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Old 07-01-2002, 06:11 PM
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There was a lady who triplets begat
Nat, Pat and Tat
It was fun breeding
But trouble feeding
Cause she didn't have a tit for Tat


Tats PG right?
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Old 07-01-2002, 06:31 PM
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I read this on the bathroom wall @ Toledo Beach Marina when I was like 8 and have never forgot it:

When i was young I had no sence,
I stuck my tounge on an electic fence,
it curled my hair and tingled my balls
made me **** my overalls

yea I know but I was 8
 
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Old 07-01-2002, 07:52 PM
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Pomeroy, Our cabin boy
that dirty little nipper.
He stuffed his a$$
with chopped glass,
and circumcised the Skipper


What a mental image!!
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Old 07-01-2002, 08:33 PM
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There was once a man from Nantucket Whom had a d#$% so long he could suck it as he wiped off his chin with a dirty grin che said if my ear were a ^@#$ I'd f%#& it
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