Here in Michigan "It's colder than a dead Eskimo's ass"! (Saying was stolen from my Uncle)

I don't make mistakes, I date them. :poopoo:

The bitterness of poor quality remains long after the sweetness of low price is forgotten.

Had that sign in my office for many years,

Doesn't know if his ******* was punched, bored, or nibbled out by a mouse.

Calm lake. Flatter than piss on a plate.

Dryer than a popcorn fart.

The title is "your best saying", so I'll pick one that I seem to say often since people typically overthink decisions as if they're going to be here forever (does not pertain to most boaters lol) or they try to live 100% risk-free.

"Nobody's gettin' out alive..."

Some others I enjoy using:

"Even a blind dog hits the hydrant every once in a while." - :)

"Rock, be rocked, or get the hell outta the way." - obvious enough

"Ah... each day better than the next..." - from Something About Mary... when someone asks how you've been... usually goes right over their head. :)

You gotta pay to play. - obvious boating expression

"Your ambition exceeded your talent." - from Casey Stoner after Valentino Rossi wiped him out in a corner

"Early worm gets the bird!" - for those folks whose impatience and rush gets their azz in a sling

"It's hotter than a whore's bed on dollar night!" - :D

Favorite of an older fellow I used to work with
If there's anything that burns my azz it's a blowtorch held up close

'Work Smart not Hard'
'Let the tool do the work'
'Ease it Bud'
'Land it'
'Hang on tight'
'Rum Dummy'
'Oh for Crying out Loud'
:signs043:

"Every day is a gift.... that's why it's called the Present" .... my Grandmother taught me that....

Good one for the women folk:

If at first you don't succeed keep sucking until you do suck seed.

If It's To Loud.... Then Your To OLD

You can have Fast, Cheap & Reliable.... Pick TWO

Don't let your alligator mouth outrun your pollywog azz!

That suks you broke. Dam ! Well, good news is, it's not my boat.

act like a prom dress and take off
make like a baby and head out

"You can me anything you want, but don't call me late for dinner."

" Can't see the forest through the trees."

If you don't have the time or money to do it right the first time, then how are you possibly going to have the time or money to redo it when it breaks.

But being in the car business there has to be a disclaimer in really small print *****This saying never applies to trades or customer's cars! :D

My buddy used to sell Toyotas at a real wh0reh0use of a dealer.......When bickering over price the salesmen loved to ask, "Would your wife take it in the brown if you saved a few bucks on the car?" Customer thinks they are asking about the car they want in a brown color.....:D

When sales are going good: Sellin' cars like candy bars!"

On a job that is not being done right......."Can't see it from my house!"

Never let your mouth write a check your azz can't cash

For my criminal defendant clients: "This isn't Etch a Sketch I cannot undo your mess completely, I can only minimize the damage."

To my girlfriends, "It won't suck itself."

Look'in cheap ain't cool &
Look'in cool ain't cheap!

Pbr me ASAP

A blind man running for his life will never see it.

Looks good from i75

Is that a roll of quarters in your pocket or are you just happy to see me???:hitfan:

That thing is stiffer than a wedding prick

We were packed in there Nutt to butt

It's colder than a well diggers ass crack

I don't no what happenend ,plenty of room

I'm down to pound down on the ground round

Speed costs money....how fast you wanna go??? (In my machinist shop)
If you don't have time to do it right the first time, you damn sure don't have time to do it twice!

Poop is lube.

When trying to get paid I always remind people that "Fast pay makes fast friends"

When considering sex with a fat girl I always remember that " you have to lower your standards to up your average" .

That girl is so ugly...........she looks like she did a 100 yard dash in a 90 yard gym!:lolhit:

If you can fill it with fuel and it has tits or wheels your in for trouble..

When some tries to tell you how to do your job...

I'm fI_Icking this chicken son, you just stand back and count the clucks!

Definately throws them off.

Brian

While trying to hook up a buddy with a large gal;
"Hey man, you'll get heat in the winter and shade in the summer!"

Lower the bar, increase the odds. Lol

I love this one.

It is what it is .

All hat, no cattle

I promise ( I WONT CUM IN YOUR MOUTH) couldnt resist.

Life is a shi+ sandwich. The more bread you have, the less shi+ you eat.